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Since he was little.

Hidden in a corner of his room while she yelled. Hungry while she was passed out on the couch.

Why couldn’t she love him like Silas’s mom loved them?

Was he that awful?

“You’re drunk,” he said through gritted teeth, fighting the burn of tears behind his eyes.

She scoffed. “Why do you think I gotta drink? Because of you. Because you stole everything from me.”

“No.”

She let go of a mocking laugh. “Why do you think your daddy left? He couldn’t stand the sight of you, either.”

A blade of pain sliced through his middle. He touched the spot, expecting his chest to be bleeding.

“That’s right,” she taunted, standing from the couch. Her bleached hair was frizzy and matted on one side, and her words slurred together. “He got one look at you and said he was going to the store, and he didn’t come back. Saddled me with your pathetic ass.”

“Fuck you.” He’d never sworn at her before, but he couldn’t stop the words from spitting through his clenched teeth.

She moved faster than he thought possible, whipping up the bottle from the table and hurling it at him.

He tried to deflect it, his hands coming up at the last minute to protect himself, but it struck him right in that aching spot.

“Get the fuck out of my sight.”

He stood there gasping. Staring at her. Hurt lancinating.

“Get out!” she screamed.

He ripped open the door and ran out, bolting across the street.

He didn’t go for the house.

He couldn’t stand for them to look at him, either.

With pity. Seeing how pathetic he was.

Instead, he rounded the house and ran into the vacant lot next door. He was gasping for breath when he hauled himself up the hill, and he slumped to the ground beneath the apple tree at the top.

He couldn’t breathe. It felt like a heavy weight was crushing his chest. The air so thin he wheezed.

He rocked his head back against the trunk then stalled when he noticed movement overhead.

Hazel eyes peered down at him.

Worry and confusion twined Elena’s expression where she was crouched on a branch.

“What are you doing in the tree, Lena?” he rasped, not sure how he was able to get the words out. He guessed it was his own worry. “You shouldn’t be up there without anyone else about.”

“I just needed to get an apple.”

She was only halfway up, so she climbed all the way down to the lowest branch, dropping a foot to the ground and landing on her feet. She settled onto her knees at his side.

Peering over at him like he was a riddle to undo.

“Are you sad?”