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I know. But you can’t just tuck me out of the way when it’s convenient. We need to communicate and make decisions together.

She was right. Nye wasn’t just the imaginary sister I’d created to help me. But a real one. She had her own thoughts and feelings, and if I had to be honest, it scared me. It scared me because she was powerful. Yes, I was too, but I could control myself.

I couldn’t control Nyah.

Seventeen

Rivven

The princess was in shock. Torvo should have expected as much, though I was impressed he and Nyah had managed to get her this far. And I had to admit she’d come through when we needed her, conjuring that dragon.

But I wanted Nyah back. I needed her, especially now, when my own hands were fisted to keep from trembling. In the space of a few hours, I had discovered my mother was alive and had been held captive and tortured for over a decade, and then she died to save me. I prided myself on my strength and stamina. I’d told myself I’d been through the worst the king could do. I was wrong, and I needed space to fall apart on my own where I wouldn’t have to share the horror with one of the people I still blamed for the situation. Even if my feelings toward Rune had grown more complicated.

“Can you manage?” I muttered to Torvo before turning toward the shadows of the forest.

“Don’t go far,” he answered, and I paused, looking back over my shoulder.

“The Cravenbeasts will be out soon—it’s nearly nightfall by my estimation,” I said in response, though I had truly no idea what time it might be. “I’ll be back with firewood to keep them away.”

With the combination of warning and pretense, I strode into the canopy of trees and focused on my breathing until I was far enough away to guarantee I could no longer be heard. Some part of me insisted I force them to hike farther into the Night Forest, but with Rune in her current condition, and honestly my own barely holding it together physically and mentally, I knew we had to risk camp for a bit. We’d traveled a good distance by air and quickly. And we could have gone in any direction as far as they were concerned. This would do.

It had to do. Because I couldn’t take another step.

I collapsed, burying my face in my hands. There, I released the sound the shattering of my heart had made when I forced myself to walk away from the woman who’d given me life, then gave her own to save me.

I doubted any animal would dare attack something that sounded as pitiful as I did, on my knees in the dirt, howling and sobbing like a madman. I’d held it in for so long. For a month, I’d buried my feelings as well as I could to prevent my captors seeing how deeply the bastards had carved with their blades.

And that brought to mind the way they’d forced my healing with the blood of my own mother.

Howling, I bent over the ground, beating it with my fists until they were bloody, crying for answers from the gods who’d abandoned us all. For what felt like hours I stayed there, pounding and lashing out at beings so silent I no longer knew if they existed.

When I was spent, I picked myself up, dusted myself off, and started gathering the wood I’d promised. By the time I returned to the spot where I’d left them, they’d already pitched a tent and curled up together beneath it, I assumed for warmth, but who knew what Torvo had been doing with his freedom while I was caged like an animal.

I tossed the wood on the ground, startling them. The princess rose and hurried over to me while I lit kindling and attempted to hide the trembling that hadn’t completely subsided. I could no longer tell if it was from my physical or emotional condition, nor whether it mattered. I acknowledged her with a grunt.

“It’s me,” she said, and I spun on my heel.

“We have to find a better way to tell who’s in control,” I ground out. I wanted to pull her into my arms and never let her go. But I was all too aware of Torvo nearby, watching with those hawklike eyes. Had he developed feelings for Rune? What would he think if I kissed Nyah while she was in Rune’s body?

For now, I contented myself with wrapping her in an embrace when she threw herself against me. I pressed my chin to her head, poking myself on her crown, so tied into her hair that I worried she’d have to cut it out.

“We’re going to work it out,” she said, eyes shining as she tilted her face to look up at me.

This body was smaller than the one I was used to, more frail. Then again, so was I.

“Rune and I, we’ll figure out a way to share for now, until I get her to remember how she manifested me as a complete person and get my body back.”

I pulled her aside, glancing over at Torvo who still sat watching. “You really think she doesn’t remember?”

She shook her head. “She was being assaulted at the time. It was the trauma.” She swallowed hard, braced herself, and looked me in the eye. “Serano raped her. It didn’t happen to me, I know that now, but I remembered pieces of it so clearly after a while that I thought it had. I remember things I shouldn’t, details.” I looked away and focused on my breath. “That’s the moment that triggered my existence. It was her only escape.”

My eyes burned, and for once no collar choked the fire out of me. “He’s going to die the same slow, painful death I promised Rufus.”

“Oh, I know, believe me.”

And there she was, my little spy. I grinned. “I will kill him if you don’t.” I meant the king, and she knew it. “I don’t care about prophecy or magic. I want the world rid of him.”

“So do I,” she said, trailing her fingers up my arms. “But I believe your mother. There’s more to this than we know. She said Revka visited Rune’s dreams and told Rune herself. She said something else before she broke the stone, Rivven.”