Page 55
Now I sat fully awake, any pretense of rest abandoned, with a cock as hard as stone and no hope of fixing it. At least, not with the one I wanted.
“You know, I’m not sure I’ve ever actually seen you sleep.”
Galan somehow managed to sneak up beside me and sit on a log near my bedroll.
“Yes, you have,” I grumbled back as I sat up.
The only sounds were the even breathing of those sleeping around us and the crackle of the flames. We both stared into the dancing fire. It was as chaotic and impatient as my thoughts.
“Mmm. Maybe. What’s plaguing you?”
“You can’t tell?” I challenged, finding it hard not to at least smirk at my friend’s humor.
“Too many choices,” Galan said, gesturing around. “I can’t tell if your mind is on revenge or Nye.”
“Both.”
Galan sighed, reaching for a long stick to poke at the fire, despite knowing it was entirely unnecessary. He’d had his fair share of food and drink with the others, and I couldn’t blame him. The smart thing to do was fuel up. There were no guarantees of further meals on our journey ahead.
“I can’t help but wonder,” I said after a while, “If it’s a mistake to run. We should have made our stand at Centos.” That was perhaps what truly bothered me most.
“Someone smart once told me it was better to wait and fight another day than die passionately.” Galan tossed the stick to the ground.
“Sounds intelligent.” He was referring to me of course. But I’d spent most of my life planning how to get inside the walls of the night kingdom. Then when I was there, I’d run the moment I got the chance.
“Don’t tell him though. He doesn’t need a bigger head.” Galan rose and began scouring the surrounding area. “Did you see where they stashed the mead?”
“I’m surprised you aren’t sharing a blanket with an Astridonian woman,” I answered.
“None would have me. Can you imagine it?” Galan’s toothy grin loosened something inside of me. Something I’d thought I’d buried.
“He killed her in front of me,” I said. “My mother.”
Galan dropped back onto the log, serious for once. “Nye mentioned it. He’d had her this whole time?”
I nodded, then rose to retrieve a bottle of the mead my friend had been searching for. I sat back down and guzzled a good quarter of the jug, staring around at the sleeping figures across the clearing. Galan pried it from my fingers and took a swig of his own, waiting in silence until I spoke again. Or didn’t.
Finally, I did. “It was clear he’d been torturing my mother for years. He had her in this sort of dungeon with the power crystal front and center that he’d used it to keep her prisoner. He used her for her seer abilities. He hadn’t even known she was my father’s wife.” The words poured from me as easily as the mead slid down my throat again after I finished. No amount would wash away the feelings threatening to send me into a fury.
“I’m sorry.” Galan watched me like one watched a wild animal they weren’t sure would attack.
“So am I. If I’d known—”
“What? You’d have busted inside the castle singlehanded and rescued her?” he mused, smirking again.
I shot him a withering look, but when my words came out, they sounded as broken as I felt. “I would have found a way.”
“Let’s go find a place to spar,” Galan suggested, standing to pry the nearly empty container from my hands. “I’ll have a chance at beating you since you’re drunk.”
“I don’t feel like it,” I said, settling down with my elbows on my knees to watch the fire.
“Now I know something is wrong.” Galan sat beside me again with a sigh. “You cannot blame yourself for something that happened when you weren’t even grown, Riv. We’ve been through this.”
“Do you have any idea how frustrating it is to witness so much and be unable to do anything about it?” I shouted the words at the fire, not wanting to take it all out on my one friend. Around us, bodies squirmed and rustled from the disruption.
I didn’t care. I stood and threw the jug into the fire, causing it to flare nearly as high as the surrounding treetops. I should burn the whole place to the ground. It was tainted by the Evil King’s darkness.
“I know exactly how that feels.”
