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I gripped Sofia’s necklace and closed my eyes. “Of course there is,” I whispered.

“The patient interviews from the earlier trials. I told you I would look into arranging them. I never did.”

“Why?”

“Because they would have taken you closer to Helix. I convinced myself that keeping Aurora separate from anything connected to Helix was protecting the work. That is also why I suspended the collaboration with Mercer.”

That was more than I could handle. I put my head in my hands and sobbed. I heard his footsteps behind me. He stopped close enough that I could feel his presence without touching me.

“Alexander, please.”

He stepped back.

“There are just so many,” I said more to myself than to him.

He exhaled, and I felt his body behind me, folding in on itself. “I knew every decision I’d made.” His voice was quiet. “I don’t think I understood what they became together until I heard myself tell you.”

“They became my life,” I said as the tears fell down my cheeks.

“I’m sorry, Emilia.” He paused. “I love you. I was afraid. Both were true. Neither gave me a right. I’m not asking you to forgive me. I hope someday you can. But I know I haven’t earned the right to ask.”

I felt him take another step back.

“What do you need from me?” he asked.

“I don’t know.”

“All right. I’m sorry, Emilia. For all of it.”

I turned around as he made his way to the door. He opened it and stepped into the hallway. A moment later, I heard it click shut.

I didn’t stop him.

It was only after the door closed that the sobs came rushing out of me. I covered my face with my hands and let them.

There had been so many decisions. So many pieces of my life I had believed I understood, only to discover someone else had been quietly shaping them around me. And they reached into everything. Alexander. Aurora. My work. My safety. Priya and Mateo. Even the ordinary routines I had begun to think of as mine.

Winston.

Blackwood.

I had uprooted my entire life to come here, building a new one along the way. A life I loved.

I just didn’t know what to do with that now.

I picked up the phone and called Charlotte. She answered on the first ring.

“Can you come back?”

“Of course.”

Twenty minutes later, she arrived carrying two pints of Häagen-Dazs and a bag of takeout.

“I don’t want to talk about it yet,” I said.

“Then we won’t.”

We spent the rest of the evening on the sofa, eating ice cream and watching movies that required absolutely nothing of me.