Page 39

Susie was speechless, her mouth opening and closing like one of the crazy golf obstacles in the theme park. ‘It isn’t?’

A laugh at the back of her throat caught Temperance by surprise. Soon, she had her hands braced against her thighs, doubled up with laughter at the fact they were arguing about who was the biggest idiot. It was clearly a photo-finish situation.

Susie could barely breathe, she was laughing so hard, tears running down her cheeks. ‘The Beast of Bodmin . . . is a . . . a . . . sausage dog! Hahahaha!’

Temperance pushed her marigolds against her collarbone. ‘Oh god, I needed that. Phew. I suppose we’d better crack on, in case that vicious guard dog comes back.’

‘And Pooky.’

‘Ha! Better put on the masks, too, while we’re at it. You ready, Professor Sprout?’

Susie shook her head. ‘I’m never going to live this down, am I?’

‘Not in this century. Cut close to the ground, remember. We need plenty of that free poison if we’re going to throw Mark off his dirty little game.’

Chapter 16

There was no reason for Susie and Temperance to drink their coffee ‘in’ at the Piglet Café, seeing as it had a shared wall with their vintage store, apart from the fact that it made it easier to plot their magical shenanigans without Stevie overhearing.

I’d love that. Was beginning to think that night really was a dream . . . How about The Fortesque at 7pm? X

‘Hooked!’ Susie cackled happily, taking a slurp of her chai latte and revelling in Mark’s reply.

Temperance scratched her scalp. ‘So are you going to just barrel up to him, rip his jacket off his arms and run for it?’

Susie frowned. ‘No. Because I need to get it back to him again, without him twigging anything is weird.’

‘Sure. You don’t want him to suspect you’re going to be dipping his leathers in organic poison. Sure.’

She flicked her long, red hair behind her shoulders. ‘I’m doing it Mata Hari style. On the surface I’ll be a smooth and sexy double agent, but underneath: the cold heart of a killer.’

‘How much caffeine have you had this morning?’

‘Enough to keep me sharp. I’ve got to keep my head in the game if I’m going to get through a drink with him and not detach his head from his body. Bloody mega-rich thinking they can come here and squeeze the life force from our village, just so they can make a quick buck to add to their mountains of gold guarded by dragons, or whatever . . .’

Temperance put her hand over the top of Susie’s mug. ‘I’m cutting you off.’

Susie wrestled it free again.

‘But are you really OK doing this?’ Temperance asked. ‘We could think of another way. It feels pretty . . . icky that you’re going to have to pretend to like him, on a date. What if he tries to kiss you again?’

A blush swept over Susie, but she pulled her mouth into a grimace. ‘I’m not even going to get close enough for him to try. He’s completely shallow, when you think about it. Using his lips and body like that . . .’ she trailed off, her eyes clouding with a memory.

‘Hello? Suse?’

‘Hmm? Yes. Exactly. One on one would be too intense. But I was thinking.’ She shuffled her chair closer to her big sister.

‘Yes?’

‘Double date?’ Susie’s voice squeaked.

‘Ha ha. Wait, let me just ask Invisible Boyfriend. Hey,’ she turned to the empty chair at their table, ‘do you fancy The Fort tonight with Suse and Salcombe’s version of Lex Luthor? No? You’re washing your invisible hair. Fair enough.’

‘I wasn’t thinking of a real date for you, just someone to up the numbers so I’m not trapped in a corner with Mark,’ she said his name like she was retching up bad sushi.

‘Let’s bring Stevie.’

‘I did think of that, but she’s bound to notice that we’re heading home with a nice bit of vintage leather, and being all sweet she’d get it back to him on the double. Before we have time to tinker.’