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“I am honored.”
“You should be.”
“I am.” He said it simply, and it landed like a stone in a pond. “I want to go slowly, Lex. Not because I do not want you. Because you do not know what you want, and I would rather have you the way you choose than the way I could take you. Do you understand?”
I did. That was the worst part. I understood exactly.
“Give me your phone,” I said.
He blinked. “I beg your pardon?”
“Your phone. I don’t have your number. It’s ridiculous. I’ve been using the guest house fax.”
“There is no fax.”
“It’s a metaphor.”
He handed it over. It was an old model with a cracked corner, and he’d never put a case on it. I typed my number in, added a contact, and stared at the name field for four full seconds. Then I typed Lex (Do NOT answer if it’s 3am) and handed it back with a grin.
He read it. His whole face went soft.
“I will answer at three a.m.,” he said.
“That’s the joke. “
“I know.” He tucked it into his sleeve. “I am simply telling you.”
I couldn’t stand there another second. I’d spilled too much on the ice, and I could feel it all soaking through me. So I did what I always do when I feel too much. I made a joke and started to skate away.
“See you tomorrow, ice prince.”
“Lex.”
I turned, backing up slowly.
He stood in the middle of the dark rink in the red light, in that black sweater, with his hands in his sleeves. “Thank you for asking,” he said. “About my teeth.”
I didn’t know what to say to that. Nobody had ever thanked me for being curious.
So I raised my hand, and I lifted a finger to my own mouth, and I turned and skated out into the dark, and I didn’t fall until I reached the tunnel.
I lay flat on the concrete, laughing, staring at the ceiling, with my whole body humming like a struck bell.
Inconclusive, I told the ceiling.
Then I lay there and said it again, softly, just to hear how it sounded.
Inconclusive.
Chapter 12
LEX
Feed on Me
For the next four days, Maksim Volkov texted me like a man writing to his bank.
Good morning, Lex. The temperature is minus four. I hope you have slept.
