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“Hurting me isn’t going to get you what you want, Raphaël.”

“Why won’t you talk about it? Have you already forgotten?”

“I wanted that child as much as you did!” I scream. “But what did you expect? Even if he had lived, I wasn’t happy with you. I would have ended up leaving you!”

“You’re only saying that because this other guy is messing with your head.”

“Is it the truth you want? Well, here it is: Vadim was the one I loved! Vadim is the one I’ve always loved! How could I have raised a child with you? You’re a child yourself, Raphaël. You refuse to grow up. You cling to me because everything else scares you. You don’t know how to face anything on your own!”

“Is that really what you think of me?”

“Yes!”

My ex stares at me for a long time, his face contorted with anger and pain, then decides to retreat. I find myself alone on the balcony, consumed by remorse.

What if he does something stupid?

I emerge from my hiding place, cross the temporary nightclub that has been set up in the living room, and give Niels and Clémentine a reassuring wave. All the others are still dancing, completely oblivious. I go after Raphaël.

I catch up with him in the stairwell, on the first-floor landing. He’s leaning against the wall, apparently trying to pull himself together. Tears are streaming down his cheeks.

“You’ve said enough, Alma, no need to rub it in. I get it, I can go fuck myself.”

“Raph, the last thing I want is to make you cry.”

“I’m crying because I was stupid enough to believe you were a good person. Not because I love you or anything.”

“I don’t want you to think that what we had was all a lie. I wanted the baby, I really did… With you.”

As I say those words, I realize I’m completely contradicting myself, but I need him to walk away with a good memory of us. I don’t want our last words to be filled with hatred and bitterness. It’s stupid, cowardly—selfish even—but that’s how it is.

What I don’t know is that everything is about to come crashing down on me. That Vadim is standing a few steps below us. And that he heard everything.

He appears, dressed in black, looking lost. More than that. Completely shaken.

“Vadim, what are…?”

“Maximilian gave me the address. Clearly, it was a bad idea.”

There, on the landing, the two men seem to be ripping each other to shreds with their eyes. Raphaël has just realized that the man standing before him is the one I’ve always loved. And Vadim, meanwhile, is meeting the man who can’t seem to let me go for the first time. And he has just found out about a mysterious baby.

“So, he’s the one who’s managed to fuck up my life?” Raphaël hisses.

“You can talk to me directly. That’s generally what adults do,” Vadim retorts.

The difference in their height only makes my ex look even less of a match for Vadim.

“Do you have any idea what you’ve destroyed?”

“No, but it’s up to Alma to tell me.”

“She was ready to marry me. Did you know that?”

“I didn’t.”

I try to step in and stop them, but Raphaël ignores me, and Vadim refuses to look at me.

“And the baby… Did you know about the baby?”