Page 10 of The Lockdown Mann

I frown at having told him that. I’m sure he doesn’t want to hear about my past family vacations. Isn’t he supposed to just ask to see my dick or something? And if he did, would I show him? Hell, he’s the one who mentioned his mom first.

GameOn057: That’s cool…what else do you like?

This isn’t going how I thought it would at all. I’m supposed to be doing something wild.

Me: Aren’t you supposed to ask to see my dick? Or my ass, I guess.

GameOn057: You can show me your dick or your ass, if you want. Are those the rules? I haven’t done this very often.

Me: Me either… I’ve actually been married. My wife and I just separated.

Ree isn’t my wife, but I call her that, the same way she’s called me her husband. It’s just easier that way.

GameOn057: Shit, sorry, man. That sucks.

Me: It’s for the best.

And clearly, I’ve lost my motherfucking mind. Why am I talking to a stranger on a hookup app about my personal life? But then, until Ree and I are ready to tell our family and announce our separation, who else should I tell? I could trust Hunter, I know that, but Serena’s words from earlier flutter through my head. I know you see our separation as some kind of failure on your part. Do I? Is that part of why I don’t want anyone to know?

GameOn057: I can still be sorry.

Yeah, yeah, I guess he can be.

Me: Thanks. So why haven’t you done this often?

GameOn057: The online thing, not the hookup thing. I’ve done the second one plenty.

Me: Had to throw that in there, didn’t you?

GameOn057: Just keeping it real. But…I don’t know. I haven’t needed to. I’m not saying that in a cocky way. It’s just the truth. Tonight, I went out to a bar with some friends, and a guy wanted to go home with me. Even though I was attracted to him, I said no, and now I guess I’m trying to figure out why in the fuck I did that.

Me: Which led you to a dating app?

GameOn057: Most guys use this for hookups, but yeah. Somehow, it led me here. I’m not sure why.

I don’t think this guy and I have much in common—not really. At least not when it comes to sex and love, but maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe I just need to step out of my norm and do something wild and different. But I’m also not in a position where I can just fuck anyone, not when I’m Oakley Manning, the professional football player who is supposed to be in a relationship and doesn’t want anyone to know I’m single.

I have to be able to trust them.