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“But that’s not all! Carl, go ahead and tell them what else you’ve won!”

I pause expectantly, leaning my ear closer to his gagged mouth as his terror-filled eyes plead for mercy that is categorically not coming. Blubbery whimpering sounds are all I hear from behind his gag.

“Nothing? Really? Ooh, tough crowd! Well, folks, he’ll also be receiving an all-expenses-paid spa package at Château de Sulfuric Acid!”

I grin widely as I gesture dramatically past where Carl is standing at the edge of a metal catwalk over the open industrial tank below…one that is currently bubbling with neon-green acid.

I am obnoxiously pleased with myself about that.

“That’s right, Carl! Tonight you’ll enjoy a full-body chemical exfoliation treatment guaranteed to take years off your appearance, if not all of them!”

I wheeze with laughter.

“This package retails for quite a pretty penny, Carl! I mean, do you have any idea how expensive it was to make this much acid, cart it all the way to your little funhouse of horrors here in the South Bronx, and pump it into these vats in the basement without anyone knowing?” I sigh. “And check out that color!” I gesture proudly at the glowing green vat below. “No expense spared, no sir. Here at Bella’s House of Consequences, presentation matters!”

God, I feel good. I was mostly kidding with Dr. Fallon earlier. But I almost do get off on this. I’d like to thank my mother’s fondness for Broadway and my father’s love for all things that go boom for my dare-I-say considerable talent for committing theatrically over-the-top murder.

“Now, Carl, some people will tell you sulfuric acid is only neon green in cartoons.” I roll my eyes. “But those people have no sense of whimsy and imagination, nor access to high-visibility fluorescent tracer dye.”

I wink as I shoot finger guns at a shuddering, pissing, probably begging Carl.

“Folks, Carl is also modeling this season’s hottest accessory, the Silence Is Golden mouth scarf! This little number is a cheeky nod to Carl and his pedo buddies warning their victims not to tell anyone, and it’s now available wherever terrible, terrible men are being held against their will.”

I lean back on my heels, grinning maniacally at the maggot of a man teetering on the brink of his own mortality right in front of me.

“And let's not forget our patented Express Descent Adventure Harness. OSHA certification pending!”

I glance at the rope tied around Carl’s waist, my eyes following it up to the steel beam rafters over our heads where it loops around and then swoops back down to a knot on the catwalk railing next to me.

“Actually, OSHA certification definitely not pending. Now, you’ll notice Carl has selected our premium catwalk package. Stunning industrial views, dramatic lighting, and look at that water feature!”

Carl makes a strangled noise.

“Sorry, acid feature. Anyway, before we reveal tonight’s grand prize, let’s learn a little about our contestant!”

I mime reading from an index card pulled dramatically from my back pocket.

“Carl Bigsby enjoys long walks, casual dining, and—oh. Oh dear.” My smile drops. “Being an absolute monster, running his little social club for other pieces of shit and their young victims from the top floor of this very building.” I cluck my tongue and level a cold, murderous look at him. “Our judges were not impressed, Carl. In fact, our judges gave you…” I drum my palms against the railing. “Death!”

I cup my hand over my mouth and make muffled oohs and ahhs, mimicking a live studio audience.

“Now, Bob, feast your eyes once again on tonight’s grand prize!” I sweep my arms toward the vat bubbling below. “A luxury full-body exfoliation using our signature industrial-strength peel in the premium radioactive-green colorway!”

Carl whimpers behind his gag.

“I know.” I beam at him. “It came out so fucking good, right?!” A sigh floats from my lips. “So, Carl. How are we feeling?”

I jam the imaginary microphone at his gagged mouth.

“Mmmph!” he bleats.

I grimace. “Ooh, sorry. We were looking for excited. The judges would also accept terrified. But don’t worry, Carl! You still win a session at Château de Sulfuric Acid, with results so dramatic your own mother won’t recognize you.”

I pause. “Actually, no one will.” My grin widens. “Which is the whole point!”

I take another pause, standing face-to-face with a monster.

Then my smile fades.