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Okay, I was absolutely pathetic, but it was the truth.

Good Lord! Had I really just word vomited all those things without thinking about it?

“Relationships are hard,” he commented, like I hadn’t just spilled my guts to him. “Trust is even harder, especially if you’ve been burned a few times.”

“I don’t think I ever really gave anyone the chance to burn me once I became an adult,” I said softly, shocked that I was willing to tell Brock things I’d never told anyone except Nina. “I was in the foster care system for most of my childhood, and that didn’t go well for me. I was never adopted, but I was with the same foster parents for most of my childhood and adolescence. It wasn’t a good experience. It would probably be hard for you to understand, but I didn’t trust anyone after spending that much time in the system. I know it’s not always bad. I know some kids get adopted and live a happy life with adoptive parents. That’s just not the way it was for me.”

My heart was racing by the time I’d finished my explanation.

I never talked about my childhood, and I had no damn idea why I was doing it now.

“I might understand better than you think,” Brock answered gruffly. “I was in the system, too.”

Chapter 8

Brock

The shock on her beautiful face was expected.

The tears that started to form in her eyes were not.

“You had a bad childhood, too?” she asked tearfully.

Fuck! Was this woman really crying for me? Her experience had been a hell of a lot worse than my own.

“Hey,” I said uncomfortably. “Don’t cry for me, Jenna. I survived. It was a long time ago.”

Granted, my shitty childhood hadn’t been nearly as bad as hers. Not even close. But I probably understood Jenna in ways that nobody else could or would.

Maybe that was why I’d initially been drawn to her.

She’d done some extraordinary things with her life despite her crap childhood and lack of support.

I wasn’t ashamed of my past. It had probably made me who I was today, but it was something I wouldn’t wish on any child.

Hell, I’d wanted to share my past with Jenna because we’d both grown up in the system, but I’d wanted her to get to know me enough to mention it to me first.

I definitely had the advantage. I knew a lot about her life…way more than I wanted to admit to her right now.

“Were you adopted?” she asked with a sniffle.

Hell, she was sweet.

Too. Damn. Sweet.

“No,” I shared honestly. I’d gone into foster care much later than Jenna. “I was twelve when my parents were killed overseas. They were doing a church mission in a part of Africa that wasn’t safe at the time. They told me that they’d be back in a few weeks. I stayed in New Mexico. I never saw them again. They were kidnapped and eventually killed. I ended up in foster care as an angry kid who was mad at the whole world, especially God for not protecting them when they were supposedly doing his work. Nobody wanted to adopt me. I was too old and too ornery. I bounced around a lot from home to home. My foster parents took care of my basic needs, but most of them had quite a few kids of their own.

“I never really bonded with any of my families. I decided that I wanted to be in special forces when I was still a pissed-off twelve-year-old. I made it my mission in life to go fight against the evil that had killed my parents. I joined the army as soon as I graduated from high school. I went to Ranger School first and then tried out for Delta as soon as I had enough experience. I don’t regret a minute of it. My childhood sucked, but my adulthood was better, so please stop crying about my past.”

Christ! I hated to see her cry, and it irritated the hell out of me that she was weeping over my childhood.

I rarely thought about it anymore.

This woman was much too empathetic for someone like me.

She swiped a tear from her face. “I think we both know that foster care is never that simple or easy.”

“It was hard,” I admitted. “It screws with your head when you’re young. People tell you things that never happen. You lose a lot of trust. But I had to learn to trust people again. When your life is in the hands of your teammates, you have no choice.”