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Penny whines, pointing to the TV and repeats ‘pig’ until I turn it to her favorite show. She settles, taking another strawberry from the bowl on the table and moves until she’s as close to the TV as she can possibly get.

I pretend to not think about a warm body in my sheets. Leaving them to smell like warm amber and vanilla. Will he regret last night?

Probably.

And doesn’t that just fucking suck? I should have put an end to it as soon as he straddled my lap. No, no—I should have put him in my truck and drove him back to his apartment down the street as soon as my cock perked up at seeing him crawling across my porch in his baby pink silk pajamas.

My phone vibrates with a text message, and I set my coffee mug on the table and pick it up.

Warren: Hey. Look man, I don't know who told Emery, but it wasn't me. I wouldn't do that, D. That's your business.

I look up when Penny laughs and let the sound work its way through my tense shoulders. I unclench my jaw and roll my neck.

Is this your way of telling me to keep my mouth shut about your business?

Warren: No. I trust you.

I roll my eyes and set the phone down next to me. Truth is, I don’t care who told Emery. It's not like it was a secret I was hellbent on keeping. I’ve just had no fucking clue how to bring it up with anyone, and yeah, maybe I was embarrassed. My embarrassment revolving around it had nothing to do with being gay and everything to do with the fact that I managed to get as old as I did before I figured it out. I always assumed that was something one would know about themselves much younger. Like Emery did. I’ve had time to process it now. Time to accept some shitty choices I made while processing.

My chest felt lighter when I left the Bennets’ yesterday, though. So maybe not being open about it bothered me more than I had realized.

My ears strain, trying to listen for any movement from down the hall in my bedroom, but it’s quiet. As the minutes tick by, I don’t try to redirect Penny from making noises. I don’t worry about whether the TV is too loud or if my baby girl will wake him up.

I have to leave in ten minutes.

I make sure Penny is occupied with the TV and give her a kiss on the cheek before walking down the hall. The bedroom door is cracked, just how I left it last night.

Just going to wake him up. Tell him I’m leaving and to lock up when he goes. Grab some clothes.

I suck in a slow breath, knocking my knuckles on the surface to push it open more. I expect a small form curled up where I left him on my side of the bed last night.

What I do not expect is for the blankets to be pulled back and no Emery in sight. I slap the door open more and frown, scanning the room.

Nothing.

No Emery in the bathroom. No Emery snooping in my closet. No Emery hiding under the bed to avoid facing me.

No Emery, anywhere.

The drive to the cabin is muscle memory now after weeks of the back and forth. I polish off the last of my coffee when I put the truck in park. It’s a beautiful day, not too hot. Which is great, because the HVAC guys don’t come until tomorrow, and I’m about done with the sweltering heat inside the cabin.

I wasn’t even going to come today. I had plans to meet up with Manna in town to hash out some plans for the upcoming contract. As soon as this cabin is finished, I told her I would be free to travel.

That’s what I told her just the other night. When Emery was glaring at me across the bar. Well, I think he was mostly glaring at her. Which I’m a fucking asshole for enjoying that as much as I did.

Amanda clocked it all immediately. The way Emery glared. The way I watched him back. The way I got up in the middle of a conversation, excusing myself because I needed to see if he would follow me.

He did.

I nearly kissed him then.

Nearly kissed him again in my bathroom that night.

Nearly. Nearly.

I exhale slowly and pull my phone out.

good morning