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“Social anxiety?” Calder scoffed. “This from the guy who sold the most door-to-door candy bars in elementary school back in the day?”
“Well, that’s because I wanted the grand prize, not because I liked people.”
Calder turned to me. “Rafe won an iPhone back when they first came out. He made going door-to-door his full-time job and went all over the borough, not just our neighborhood. He sold hundreds, maybe thousands, of candy bars.”
“Twelve-hundred fifty-four to be exact. But that was ten-year-old me, brother. I wouldn’t want to deal with that today. I know you were pissed, though, because I beat you.”
Calder shrugged. “It’s all good. I was happy for you.”
“You should’ve been. We both played around on that phone.”
“This guy used to practically live at my house,” Calder told me.
“Thanks to my shitty stepfather, yeah. I appreciated having a normal, calm place to hang out.” Rafe put his hand on Calder’s shoulder.
Calder nearly spit out his coffee. “Dude, you smash glass for a living. So much for calm.”
“That does calm me down, actually.”
“I guess I can see that.” Calder nodded.
I cleared my throat. “Calder told me you taught yourself how to do it?”
Rafe turned his whole body toward me. “Yeah.”
“That’s so crazy.” I shook my head. “I can’t comprehend it.”
Rafe shrugged and quickly changed the subject. “My aunt said you’re a writer.”
“I am.” I smiled. “Well…I write. Not a published author or anything yet.”
“Yet.” A mischievous smile tugged at his mouth. “Yet is a powerful word. It’s a promise that something will happen, and if you believe it will, it will. Know what I mean?”
“I do.” My eyes got lost in his for a moment before I forced my gaze away.
“You okay?” he asked Calder. “You’re bouncing your legs a lot.”
“Just stressed about today.”
“Today is your actual first day?” Rafe asked.
Calder sighed. “In the new office, yeah.”
“Oh shit. I don’t think I realized that.” Rafe narrowed his eyes. “You’re starting on a fucking Friday?”
“Yeah.” Calder sighed. “I think they figured it would be a good way to get my feet wet before hitting the ground running on Monday. Pretty sure today is just for formalities, like getting set up in my office, logging into the system, stuff like that.”
Rafe smacked him on the back. “Then you should be good, right? No need to freak out. You’ve done this job for the last year, just somewhere else, right?”
“Same title, but this is actual Wall Street.”
“There’s nothing you can’t bullshit your way through, Calder.” Rafe glanced over at me. “This guy used to be on the debate team in school and not even study the subject he was debating on. Yet he always sounded like he knew what he was talking about.”
The two guys went back and forth for the next several minutes, trading tales and private jokes. Calder explained to Rafe a bit more about his new office, and I sat back and watched, taking in their rapport and sneaking looks at Rafe’s stunning face when both men were looking away.
Thank God neither of them knew what I was thinking. The fact that I found myself so attracted to Calder’s friend was honestly embarrassing. What kind of a person did that make me? Human, I supposed, since there was absolutely nothing you could do about pure, animalistic physical attraction. But maybe it wasn’t just physical. Watching Rafe perform last night had felt almost…spiritual. I was someone constantly looking for inspiration to ignite my creativity, and Rafe Rivers had delivered. I’d felt alive since last night in a way I couldn’t remember feeling for a very long time.
And naturally, having that thought made me feel guilty all over again. I supposed I needed to give myself grace; I’d just experienced a life-changing move, not to mention the loss of my father, and I was a bit emotional over leaving home. I guess I was just overly sensitized to everything—and that included my boyfriend’s smoking-hot artist best friend.
