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He held up a hand, cutting me off with a sigh. “Don’t worry. I have no intention to die. I mean, not like that.” He shuddered.
“Fuck. I’m not joking.”
“I know. I know.” Enzo grinned. “If I do die, though, can you promise me something?”
“You’re a fucking idiot.”
“Make sure my funeral is packed,” he said, straight-faced. “I also don’t want cheap-ass flowers either. Go all out—lily of the valley, orchids, maybe even one of those massive floral crosses.”
“Enzo—”
“And don’t pick the music yourself,” he continued, ignoring me. “Ask Irene. She’ll pick something good. Something people can awkwardly dance to.”
I laughed despite myself. “You’re fucking unbelievable.”
“Hey, if I’m going out, I want to go out in style,” Enzo said with a wink. “But really, don’t forget those little sandwiches. I hate funerals without food.”
“You’re assuming I’ll have time to throw you a proper funeral,” I said. “If you die, I’ll probably throw you in the incinerator and go back to hunting the killer.”
Enzo put his palm over his heart.
“No. You’ll only hunt the killer after throwing me a grand funeral, and then… just make sure whoever kills me ends up becoming a barbecue.”
“Fuck off.”
“You love me,” he said smugly. “You were this close to crying when you pulled me out of that coffin.”
I shook my head.
“Just stay alive, okay? I don’t want to add planning your ridiculous funeral to my to-do list. It’s already too big as it is.”
“Scout’s honor,” he said, holding up three fingers. “Don’t forget the sandwiches.”
“I won’t.” I smiled. “I’ll probably be bringing in a guest tonight. Get everything ready for me.”
“Wait, what?” Enzo’s eyes narrowed. “Who is it this time?” His frown deepened. “Don’t you think it’s a bit risky to—”
“She needs it,” I said.
Enzo groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose.
“I just can’t… with you two. No one in the whole wide world gives his woman a living thing to kill… let alone a human.”
“Well,” I said with a smirk, “he’s not exactly human anyway.”
“What if Irene finds out?” Enzo asked with a frown. “What if she stumbled right when you’re burning a whole ass man and—”
I shrugged with a smile. “That’s why you’re here. Make sure Irene doesn’t go anywhere near the crematorium tonight. Better yet, take her out. Just take her out.”
“Take her out?”
“To the Onyx, maybe?”
“No. She’s not allowed there,” Enzo said, crossing his arms.
“She’s turning twenty-two in a few months,” I said.
“We’ll take her to Onyx when she turns thirty.” He let out a long sigh, muttering something under his breath before pointing a finger at me. “You be careful, okay?”
