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THE PRICE OF PEACE
NOAH
“You think I’ll stop just because you kill me, you bastard?”
It hadn’t even been two days, and she was already here, already whispering in my ear. It took four months for her to come back after I killed Sofia.
I grabbed a glass and poured cold water, leaning against the kitchen wall.
“Leave me alone.”
“Why would I? You looked me in the eyes as I died. You never even made a move to save your own mother.”
“Why would I save someone who tried to kill me… who… who…”
“I’ll forever torment you.”
I hit my head with my palm, over and over again, hoping the voices would stop.
“You’re a bitch, and I don’t care anymore. I’ll kill you again. I’ll do it until you are dead.”
I threw the glass at the wall and watched it shatter. It created a soft clink as it met the carpet.
“They don’t even give a shit about you. It has been two days, and you are still as inconsequential as ever. They don’t talk about you, they don’t fear you, because they already know. They know you are a weak, pathetic little coward.”
“Shut up, shut up, shut up.”
“Are you alright? Who are you—”
My brother stopped and winced when he saw the broken glass.
“Just tell me what I can do to help you?” He leaned closer, eyes filled with worry. “Please. Please.”
“Nothing,” I whispered as he set his laptop down and turned to look at me, eyes narrowed.
“You have to find a way to get better. You look terrible, and I don’t…”
I sighed, closing my eyes, thinking about the bitch I killed.
When I told her she was beautiful, she laughed. Like it was a joke. Like I was a joke.
She wasn’t the one I wanted, but it was all the same.
They were all the same.
“I tried,” I said with a frown as he cleaned up the broken glass. He was always cleaning up after me, and never… never complaining. “I tried. But I know now. It’s impossible.”
“You didn’t try enough. Why don’t you find a different psychiatrist to—”
“Not this again,” I said with a snarl. I was tired of talking about shrinks. They talked and talked, never knowing what it was I wanted to talk about. They never listened to the things I said. If they had, they would have known.
“At least, start a hobby,” Grant said, looking at me with a sigh.
I had a hobby. One that took all my time. He just wouldn’t understand it or appreciate it.
“Stop worrying about me. How’s work?” I asked, trying to steer him away from me. “We have been talking about opening another one in a new location.” His eyes were animated as he waved his hands around. He was always excited to talk about Onyx, and I knew it would distract him, at least temporarily.
