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Chapter One
Tony
Falling in love was no joke, especially when the first time was with your best friend and those feelings weren’t reciprocated.
Falling in love the second time wasn’t any better.
Not when it’s someone you work with or who I’m guessing was a good twenty years older than me and dedicated to living the single life.
What the fuck was wrong with me?
These are the worries that plague me as my mind wanders while I ride on the back of Wolf’s Harley. The very man I’ve found myself having those strong feelings for. He’s a lone wolf, total pun intended, never meant to settle down. And a longtime employee of our band’s management company, Masterson.
Why, please tell me why my heart does nothing but get us into these hopeless situations?
It was the hardest thing to admit that I not only loved Bowie, but that he was the right man for me. Or me for him. Same difference, just more painful that way. But he didn’t laugh or tell me to fuck off when I told him. He gently let me down and we even hugged it out. Thankfully, my stupid heart hadn’t ruined our friendship. That would’ve crushed me.
And here my dumbass was, ready to spit out the words no man in my life seemed to want to hear…nor say to me. My sperm donor included. He was more of a let me beat you down with my fists and words, type.
But fuck, man, I’d give just about anything to have one of them say those three words to me and actually mean them.
Well, Wolf, that is…
Bowie has told me many times he loves me like a brother. Something I’ve finally learned to accept and appreciate. Without his friendship and the love his family has shown me, there’d be no reason for me to still be here.
Shake it off, Tony. Don’t let your depression ruin this beautiful day.
We drove onto the ferry out of Mukilteo that would take us to Whidbey Island. I’d never been here before, but Wolf said it’s one of his favorite rides to take the Harley out on. I was game for pretty much anything he wanted to do that included me.
How pitiful was that?
Fuck, I am such a desperate loser.
Once we parked on the ferry, we hopped off the bike and left our helmets there. Hopefully they’ll still be hanging from the handlebars when we return. We didn’t dare leave our leathers, those were far too expensive to risk. “Been all around the world and yet nothing takes my breath away quite like this,” Wolf said as we stared out at the sound from the viewing deck.
“It is amazing. Lived my entire life in the Pacific Northwest, been to Seattle many times yet I never rode the ferries.”
“Never?”
“Nope.”
“Well, Little Wren, I’m happy to be a part of your first ride.”
“Little Wren?”
“Yes, the happy little bird who’s beautiful melodic voice brings others joy. Only, you don’t look as happy now as you did when we left this morning. Wanna talk about it?”
Did I?
The look on his face said I didn’t have a choice.
“It’s just gonna sound pitiful and needy.”
“You let me be the judge of that.”
“It’s nothing, really, I’ll get over it.”
His heavy sigh said it all—I was treading on thin ice.
