Page 31

I press the button for floor three—the one with the good coffee—and watch the doors close at a painfully slow pace, all while standing just enough in front of him to make things even more awkward.

My chest tightens as I stare straight ahead, my mind racing through all the things I could turn around for.

I've thought about moments like this one—like the one in the park—for years.

What would I say if I ever saw him again? If we ever got the chance to be one on one?

But this isn't how I pictured it. Not in a hospital—not in a park—and damn sure not stuck in a small metal box that feels like it's shrinking by the second.

In my mind—and dreams—it was always… picturesque. We'd bump into each other strolling along a flower-lined walking path. Maybe I'd end up at a baseball game and he'd spot me in the crowd out of the thousands of people there.

We would have our brief moment of uncomfortableness, sure, but eventually, he'd tell me that he's thought about me all this time. That he misses me. Forgives me.

That he has been waiting for this moment the same as I have.

But instead, I nearly ran his little sister over, then interrupted what might've been his one moment of peace in the form of an elevator ride.

Still, my mind sorts through all possible responses to us being together now—

What are you doing here?

Is everything okay?

Can we go back in time and just… redo it all?

But before I get a chance to choose one, I hear him inhale a deep breath.

"So, you really are a nurse, huh?"

My head whips over my shoulder like I'm not sure he's talking to me or if I missed someone else being in here during my brief paralysis earlier.

"Oh… yeah. In the ER. We had a kid come in with a berry in his ear earlier so I just ran up to ENT to check on him."

"What kind?" he asks casually.

I square my shoulders to face him trying to decide how to say ER nurse another way. "What?" I go with.

"The berry," he says, pushing off the wall and shoving his hands into his pocket. "Was it a strawberry? Blueberry? Ras—"

"Blueberry," I cut in to save us both.

He huffs out a laugh and hangs his head, and I immediately wonder if he's also remembering that day in the hall.

One of the first days that everything changed.

"So…" he starts again, his eyes still on the floor. "I guess you left after all."

My whole body goes rigid.

I can't believe he actually said it.

Suddenly the elevator seems more like a coffin, and the bell that dings as we pass each floor is like a ticking time bomb.

Once again, I sift through options. Explaining everything right here and now feels like entirely too much, but a simple yes doesn't feel like enough.

"It's fine," Jace says, saving me again. "It's been a long time, Lenny."

I swallow hard, trying my best to ignore the gut-punch he once again just fed me.