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"Veronica offered to help me feel better." He winks as he takes a sip of his beer, then glances at the red-head.
"She sounds very nice."
"She is," he says. "And apparently so is her friend—Casey." He looks back over his shoulder to where the blonde who was once on the edge of my chair is now in the middle of the dancers again.
I nod, knowingly. "That's probably true."
JJ takes a slow breath in and blows it out steadily. "But you're not interested."
He says it like a statement because he knows it's not a question.
"I'm all good, man. Seriously."
"Mhmm," he hums. He takes another sip of his beer as his eyes wander the room. "That's what you're always telling me."
He finds me again, his stare unwavering as he waits for an answer that doesn't come. I finish my beer, glancing behind me at the window again before I can stop myself.
"Is this about V's appointment the other day?" JJ asks unexpectedly.
I shake my head. "Nothing's about anything. I'm just havin' fun hangin' out."
"Are you though?" he shoots back.
I narrow my eyes, my throat growing tighter.
JJ turns fully toward me. "Jace, we've been tight since your rookie season, and I don't think I've ever seen you fully let loose. Come on, man. First it was the game—you had to focus on that. Fair. Then it was your family. But they seem settled now, right? Your mom's good? V's good?"
I shrug him off. "I guess."
He looks at the ceiling. "They are, I'm sure. So what is it now?"
I feel him looking at me as I stare at the game on T.V. like I give a shit who's winning.
"You don't have to tell me," he says quieter. "But don't pretend it's nothing." He studies me for a second like he's trying to decide how far to push it, then sighs.
I consider explaining everything.
Who she is. Who she was. Who we never got to be.
But then I look out the window again and realize that even if Lenny's square just happens to be bright, it isn't lit for me.
It hasn't been for years.
And even when it was, she didn't pick us in the end. So why am I still choosing her? Over and over.
"Alright, yeah," I say, full of false motivation. I nod toward the rest of the party. "I'll… come hang out."
JJ smiles at me—relieved not smug—and throws his arm around my shoulders. "Hell yes." He pulls me in tighter. "It's about damn time."
I scoff lightheartedly.
"Man," he continues. "I'm pretty good. I didn't think you'd actually cave."
"I didn't cave," I shoot back.
He laughs. "Whatever helps you sleep at night."
The music swallows us again as he drags me back toward the pong table. The red-head cheers when I get to my spot at the end of the table as one of the hockey guys replaces the empty can in my hand with a Solo cup.