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"Get to bed early then."

I scoff. "Yeah, sure."

She tilts her head.

"I don't really sleep well in general."

I admit it without meaning to, and aggravation claws instantly at my chest.

So much has changed, but not how easy it is to talk to her.

Lenny's brow creases. Now it's her turn to study me. She hums. "I guess not all habits stick."

My mouth curls as I fight an unexpected smile. Lenny waits for me to crack, her lips still set in a straight line waiting to react until she sees mine break.

God, I remember that look.

I drop my gaze to the ground, avoiding it, and pretending to be interested in the gravel below my feet—my one last attempt to shove the memory trying to surface back down where it belongs.

But when I sneak a peek at Lenny and catch her smiling anyway, I can't fight it anymore. I lift my head slowly as the nostalgia creeps back in full force.

"It wasn't that bad," I argue lightheartedly.

"Jace…" She grins.

"Lenny…"

She arches her brow. "You literally used to pass out while we were on the phone—snoring and all."

"I did not snore," I throw back.

"You did."

"Well, it was late."

Lenny pauses. "Was it?"

"I mean…" I cross my arms, relieving some of the tightness in my shoulders. "Maybe you just put me to sleep."

She tilts her head and purses her lips, her expression skeptical. Unoffended. Questioning me without any words at all.

So much comes to mind as I get wrapped up in the joke—things I want to say like you never used to mind back then.

And some things I don't. Like you weren't boring. I just liked knowing you were there.

I scan her face, deciding what to go with.

Every emotion from the morning hits me all at once—anticipation, hope, suspense, anger, bitterness, frustration—until all that's left is something close to sadness.

It should be easy with Lenny. Not just in the moments when I forget to hate her, or when I get caught up in the memories. It should be because it always was. Because she shouldn't feel like a half-stranger I've been at war with myself over since the second I saw her again.

She should still feel like home.

But she doesn't.

And so it isn't easy. It's really fucking hard. Especially when I have to remind myself that she's not the Lenny I once knew.

Because that girl never made it out of Mage.