Page 27

He pressed damp, cold lips to mine. “You are not stupid. You’re the smartest, prettiest man I know, but, Arch, when I say you gotta run, baby, you gotta run.”

“I will. I promise. I’ll run hard.” He placed his brow on mine. My eyes drifted closed for a moment, eager to absorb this small touch of tenderness. If only I could sink into his arms and sleep for a few days…

“Also, promise me that when we get home, you’ll start jogging with me every day,” he said, his tone gentle but firm.

“I promise.” I slid my arms around him.

“Will you really?”

“Probably not.” I peeked up through wet bangs and smudged glasses. “Will you love me anyway?”

“Totally.” He stole another kiss. Outside, the howls of a wounded cryptid echoed through the woods, the sound of birdsong silent for several moments then gradually returning. The hidebehind was far off now, thank all the gods. “We need to redo your bandage then get to work on our pepper and jam bombs. We’ll need every advantage we have to set up the ceremonial ring.”

We had no clue whether what Elspeth had jotted down in her journal a few hundred years ago would work, but we were going to find out. Pity we weren’t taking notes from a cookbook. I could use the energy from something full of sugar and lard right about now.

***

While tearing an old sheet found in a footlocker into tiny squares for pepper grenades, I had a stab of guilt. I looked over the top of my glasses at Phil dumping crushed red pepper mixed with black pepper into a square, his nose and eyes watering, and the guilt doubled. His arm would be scarred for sure. Who knew what kind of nasty bacteria lingered on a cryptid’s claws. He should be taken to the nearest ER for some sutures and a megadose of precautionary antibiotics. Did legendary monsters carry rabies? My head was spinning out of control. Phil looked over when a tiny, shaky breath fluttered out of me.

“Pepper is killer,” he said thickly, which only made me feel worse. I laid down my little Swiss Army knife and used the sheet I’d been hacking up to wipe my nose.

“I’m really sorry about this mess.” Phil’s eyebrows beetled in confusion. “This. This whole fiasco. The lack of food, no water left, your arm, the dead logger. My inability to run. I even feel bad about whacking the hidebehind with the cleaver. I’ve never hurt another living thing in my life. It’s against the beliefs Yeye brought me up with.” My chest felt tight. “Now we have to kill it, and that’s…that’s…I’m sorry for dragging you into this. You should be home playing baseball with a normal guy or girl at your side, not some—”

The rest of the oncoming panic/guilt trip/exhaustion outburst was cut short by his lips crushing mine. I threw myself at him, scattering bits of old cotton as his arms linked tightly around me. His embrace was so soothing. It was akin to a dog who’s scared of thunder having his master slide on one of those doggie thunder vests. I clambered into his lap, sending cans of pepper tumbling. Kissing him madly for a moment before the urge to sneeze overtook me, I pulled away before the ah-choo arrived. When it did, it was followed by another and another. Phil started sneezing as well. Hearty bless you blasts that ran on and on until we were both weeping with mirth instead of guilt.

“This…ah-choo…is so…ah-choo…romantic,” he coughed out as I lay like a limpet in his arms, face in his throat, my ass on his thick thighs. “My nose is on fire,” he joked, nuzzling it into my lank hair. “I need you to hear me out, Arch.”

I mumbled something wearily into his shoulder, unwilling to move.

“Hey, look at me.”

“No, I want to sleep here in your arms,” I whined, tears smearing my glasses as I burrowed my face deeper.

He kissed my hair and gently slid a hand between my nose and his clavicle. With a whine, he lifted my face up. I stared into red-rimmed blue eyes. “Hear me out. Hey, listen to me, okay? I’m here because I want to be.” I shook my head. “Hey, no, I am, and you know it. Also, we’re in this spot due to my stupid parents investing in this stupid camp for their stupid holy war crusade against anything they think is different. Blame them, not yourself.”

“I could have said no. I should have said no.”

“Nope, you and I decided on this together. Yeye will have a nice nest egg once we’re through here. No more worries over money or taxes or the cost of gas. We both decided to do this for him. You didn’t twist my arm. So, stop blaming yourself. Also, I know you and Yeye are all about non-violence. I’ve seen him take spiders outside, or rescue an ant in the sink, or refuse to use a glue trap in the bookstore. But this isn’t a normal creature—it’s a monster. And it has killed people.” He jerked his chin in the general vicinity of Henry, levitating silently in the corner, always watchful, always quiet as a beetle. “And I know we don’t want bad karma to follow us to another form, but this thing is evil. I get it that your lineage is all about saving beings with compassion instead of annihilating them. Like what we did at Lake Killikee or up at the asylum. You helped those spirits move over, and it was good. Lots of good karma. I’m not sure we can reason with this thing, Arch. I think we’re going to have to destroy it.”

“There could be another way,” I whispered as his thumbs stroked my face. He looked at me so tenderly, even though I had to look like yesterday’s garbage. Probably smelled like it too. “A great master wouldn’t kill a malevolent spirit. He would overpower it spiritually then bind them by oath to protect the people, not harm them, just as Padmasambhava did when he introduced Buddhism to Tibet.”

“Cool, and yay for that dude, but this isn’t a spirit. It’s a monster. And I don’t think there is any way you have enough spiritual power left to bind a mosquito, let alone a cryptid with a fondness for human flesh. We have to eradicate it, Arch, before it kills someone else.”

I withered back into his chest, my cheek resting on his shoulder once more. I was so damned tired. Fatigue was making me sappy.

“You’re right.” I sighed, letting my burning eyes close for just a minute. Just one damn minute to rest here in his strong, loving arms…

“Hey, you need to wake up.” I jolted awake, startled to see I’d dozed off without warning. “It’s okay. A power nap works wonders. You look better.” He cupped my chin in his hand, a hand coated with his own dried blood and flecks of black pepper.

“Liar,” I whispered but gave him a smile. “Sorry about all that.” I didn’t move from his lap, but I did sit back slightly. “That wasn’t very professional ghosthunter of me, was it?”

“I bet every one of your ancestors who possessed your gift had weak moments too. They were only human, just like you. Now kiss me. We need to get these dust bombs ready. The sooner we can set up the fire circle, the sooner we can haul our asses out of here to find some help.”

“Right. You’re right.” I kissed him soundly and wiggled off his legs, feeling rather silly as Henry observed me swiping at my face with the back of my hands. “We have a job to do here. Cleanse the camp and give Yeye a sound financial future.”

“That’s right. For Yeye,” Phil replied, sneezing softly.

For Yeye. And for any other innocent person who hiked into this miserable place by mistake and ended up cryptid chow.