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I’ve accepted that I have to move, but I still feel sad anytime I think about it. To make it harder, I now see Hayden in every corner of my house. Curled up on the couch with my cat on his lap, standing in the kitchen chopping vegetables, in the shower with water cascading down his beautiful body, and most importantly, asleep next to me in bed at night.

I don’t understand how I can feel so happy while simultaneously feeling like a wave of dread keeps crashing down on me.

The week before the funeral, he takes me to the Thunder Rally, the yearly motorcycle event held in our town. I’ve never been interested in motorcycles, but I can’t help being fascinated by the event. We walk around hand in hand, and he points out various bikes to me, his eyes full of childlike wonder. He talks to a bunch of other fanatics, and I get swept up in his excitement.

“Thanks for taking me with you,” I say on the drive home. It’s dark already, and the rally ended hours ago, but we went to dinner right after. “But I feel bad that you weren’t able to come with your bike because of me.”

He waves me off and places his hand on my leg. “I’d rather come with you and no bike than come on a bike without you.”

“You’re too sweet,” I say, and I mean it.

“No, just obsessed with you.” He squeezes my thigh.

“I’ll get over my fear of riding on a motorcycle eventually.”

“It’s okay. It’s not for everyone.”

“Do you go to events like that back home? I’m sure they have them too.”

“No, I haven’t gone to any.”

“How come?” I’m genuinely surprised. It’s clearly his passion.

“I’m not sure. If I’m being honest, I just got caught up with life and didn’t make time for it. But I should.”

I understand that better than anyone. How many times in my life have I not done something I enjoy because I’m too busy stuck in my own head and in my day-to-day existence?

“Well, I’ll go with you anytime.” I lean over to kiss him on the cheek.

“I’ll hold you to that.” He smiles as he pulls into my driveway, cutting the engine and unbuckling his seatbelt before he looks over at me. “Have I told you that you’re really pretty?”

“Yeah, like every day for the past month,” I say with a chuckle. “Are you trying to butter me up for sex?”

“Do I have to butter you up for that?” He cocks his head at me, his expression full of amusement.

“No,” I admit with a sigh.

He hums and leans over to cup my cheek with his right hand. He traces my jawline, looking at my lips longingly. Just when I think he’s about to kiss me, he whispers, “Race you to the front door?” And before I know what’s happening, he’s already halfway out the car.

It takes a second for my brain to catch up before I throw open the passenger side door and hurl myself out of the car. “I liked it better when you insisted on opening the car door for me,” I shout after him, laughing as I try to keep up with his long legs. But when I race up the porch steps, he’s already leaning against my front door.

“Took you long enough, baby. What do I get for winning?”

“You’re lucky if I don’t smack you. What do I get for putting up with you?” I get my key out to unlock the front door.

“Easy. My hands, mouth, and dick.”

I snort. “I’m not sure that’s enough.” I step inside, and he follows me.

“Oh, I’ll prove you wrong,” he says, throwing me over his shoulder.

I shriek in surprise as he carries me down the hallway to my bedroom, but I can’t stop laughing.

I really don’t want things with him to end.

Chapter 27

Hayden