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It didn’t work.

“I’m all the above. Now spill it,” Myla said as she sat atop her desk.

“Do your clients know you talk so vulgar and brash? Just be saying all kinds of shit out your mouth,”

“Mimi!”

“Ok, damn!” Miranda conceded.

Once Myla was on her fact-seeking journey, there was no getting around telling the truth.

“When I went to Mardi Gras last year, I met this guy named Dean. Fine ass, tall ass, dark-skinned God of a man. I swear he could be an African warrior with his muscle-ripped body, bowlegs, and that anaconda between his legs was just…mmm,” Miranda moaned.

She couldn’t even finish her sentence. She chef-kissed the tips of her fingers as if she were saying Dean’s man meat was magnifique.

Myla shook her head and laughed. She knew her best friend very well and already knew where this tale was going.

“So, your one-night stand popped back up, h’uh?”

“Girl, yes. Come to find out, what I thought was a man was barely legal. I met him on his twentieth birthday. The way he was slanging tongue and dick, I could not tell he was twenty years old. Ol’ Boy was seasoned, like he was born to please a woman. Had my ass ready to quit my job and move to where he was,” Miranda stated, causing Myla to laugh.

“You are so crazy, Miranda! I heard these young bulls be signing their name on some pussy. But besides you wanting to throw your stability away, barely legal isn’t illegal. So, what’s the problem?” Myla asked seriously.

The question made Miranda look at her friend. Her heart nearly burst with love. If she didn’t know anything, she knew that Myla loved her unconditionally. Myla knew all of her secrets and never judged. What Miranda didn’t know was that Myla never judged her, because she had secrets of her own.

“Miranda Renee Oxendine!”

Miranda jumped at the sound of Myla’s voice. She had not realized that she was sitting there staring.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry, girl. What was I saying?” Miranda asked.

“You were about to tell me why running into your barely legal dick slinger made you run for the hills.” Myla laughed.

“Oh, my God. Don’t call him that.” Miranda cringed.

The saying ‘age ain’t nothing but a number’ was not a phrase that she agreed with. Thirty and older was her preference. Entertaining someone three years older than her daughter made her skin crawl.

“But anyway, him being barely legal is not what made me run my ass out of New Orleans. What ran me out of The Big Easy was the fact that his fine ass was Heaven’s swimming coach!”

Myla’s eyes nearly popped out of her head. Of all the things she expected Miranda to say, she was not expecting that.

“What the fuck!! Stop lying!!!”

“I swear on my bald vagina. Seven months ago, when I received the email from the Louisiana High School Athletic Association, stating that Heaven had been selected to compete and that Coach Jody Cordean would be training her, I thought nothing of it. Shit, with the name Jody, I thought it was a damn woman,” Miranda said animatedly.

“His name is Jody. Oh, laying pipe is his birthright.” Myla laughed as she began to sing Marvin Sease’s ‘I’m Mr. Jody.’

She laughed so hard that her stomach ached. Tears came to her eyes as she fought to catch her breath. The laughs and jokes just came naturally. This is what she had missed in the seventy-two hours when she and Miranda didn’t speak.

“When I saw him after Heaven won, I almost had a heart attack. The look on his face said that he wasn’t expecting to see me either. After the celebration, pictures, and dinner, he had the nerve to corner me, stick his hand up my skirt, and ask me if we could sneak away and celebrate on his balcony.

“I hate to admit it, but I was soaking wet for his fine ass. As soon as he hit me with that “NOLA baby,” that Louisiana accent almost got me. He almost had my ass in a pretzel. I struggled with the Angel and Demon on my shoulders, and the Angel won. Before I did anything to disrespect, humiliate, or overshadow the hard work my daughter did, I’d leave. I grabbed some tissue, dried my pussy juice, threw our things in the car, and hauled ass back to The Sunshine State. Mr. Jody got some ‘risk it all’ dick, but I’d never risk the bond my baby and I have. Do you know how devastated she’d be if she knew I had sex with her coach?” Miranda whispered, sex with her coach, as if someone other than Myla could hear her.

Even though the act between her and Jody happened long before he trained Heaven in competitive swimming, the thought of her ever finding out filled her with dread.

“There’s no one here. Why are you whispering?” Myla laughed. She asked the question even though she already knew the answer. Miranda was paranoid.

“You can never be too sure. Walls have ears sometimes. I never want my baby to think that she got what she has because of my open legs,” Miranda said as she continued to look around the empty office. She knew that people loved to create their version of the truth from a lie. The thought of someone creating the narrative that she had to sleep with a coach to get her daughter on a swim team disgusted her.