AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“He set up situations for me, and required that I submit to his sexual demands. He dressed me in exotic clothes, and gave me to other men who used me. They tied me up and spanked my bottom until it was raw, and then took me in the ass. As much as I often resisted the extremes he demanded, my months with him were deeply satisfying. There were softer scenes too. Group sex with women and men, when I discovered my bisexuality. I learned that the bounds of my real sexual appetites were very wide, and that at the very core of my sexuality, I’m basically submissive.”
“This was what you’d fantasized about, these scenes Reggie created?”
“Many times. But don’t get me wrong. Our relationship was hardly blissful. I was angry that he wasn’t going to be my lover. He demanded all these things and at best, he stood back and watched. Sometimes he completely ignored me once he set his plans in motion. It was a savage thorn in my side that he didn’t want to have me for himself, and it became my goal to become his lover.”
“You were never lovers?” Jocelyn asked.
“Only at the very end. The first time Reggie took me into his world was about four years ago. I wanted him so much that I forgot about Will altogether, and he knew that. Just before it was time for me to leave him, he gave me my great desire. He set up a scene that ended with just the two of us. That night, we tried to make a connection, and everything should have been perfect. I’m still not sure what happened. But after all he put me through, and considering his very intimate knowledge of me, the lovemaking was so impersonal. I was betrayed by his coldness, his inability to give back to me what I really wanted. There was so much inside me that I wanted to share with him, but he wasn’t able to go there. He seemed okay with that. But I certainly wasn’t.”
She paused letting the old sadness claim her again.
“I realized then that he wasn’t the man I really needed. I finally got my head on straight and moved back in with Will where I belonged.”
Jocelyn let the story settle, wondering for herself why Reggie would go to such lengths with a woman, when he asked for so little for himself.
“But you’ve been with him more recently, haven’t you?”
“It was just a short time, and it was very different from the first. Will and I separated because of a stupid mistake I made. Will suggested that if I wanted to make amends, I submit to Reggie again, which was the last thing I ever wanted to do. But…I wanted Will enough to humble myself before the master and take my lickings.”
“So he punished you?”
“It was pretty personal this time. He focused on my ass. It makes me burn even now to think of it. My poor bottom should be callused as much as he spanked me, and caned me, and strapped me. He did it all. This fair ass was blushing regularly. And even now, there’s something about the way Reggie disciplines me that’s unique. Will has his own technique. But he doesn’t have the same command as Reggie. I think it’s because Will loves me, which makes a big difference. Reggie loves to abuse rear ends, of course you likely know that.”
“I do.”
“This second time, he was still cold and distant. But for the first time, I saw a crack in his steel-plated armor. Like he wanted something more. Not necessarily from me, but from some woman. Frankly, I think his friendship with Will prevented him from going very far with me. He’s intensely loyal. Though we did make love, if you could call it that. It felt like two lonely, empty people coming together, finding some kind of bond in that. But it was never anything that could last. When the time was right, he turned over the reins to Will.”
“And you’re no longer in love with him?”
“I don’t think what I felt was ever love. You can’t love, really love, what you don’t know.”
“But he can still make you obey him?” She recalled the night in Alex’s apartment.
“He can still remind me of who I am, when I find myself faltering. But that’s not love, Jocelyn. That’s mortal fear. The situation you’re thinking of a few weeks ago, he was one step from joining Will in his battle with me. And I had no desire to have my ass end burning more than it already was.”
In the long silence that followed their eyes met. Some curious union begun between them. Something in common and something opposite in their natures made a blossoming friendship.
“You’ve been on a wild ride,” Jocelyn observed.
“And you too I gather?” Alex asked.
“It’s why I’m hiding away in my apartment not calling him, because I don’t know what to say.”
“How about the truth?” Alex suggested.
“I’m afraid of how he’ll take it. I can’t imagine letting him down, how he’ll take the hurt. If he’ll hurt at all. But I also know, I can’t have the relationship he wants.”
“You need to talk to him Sitting in your apartment avoiding Reg and trying to figure it out will get you no answers.”
She nodded, looking into Alex’s understanding face. “You’re a wise woman,” Jocelyn observed.
“As wise as you are, I’m sure. Why don’t you join Will and me tomorrow. We’re going out on the lake, just a little gathering of friends, nothing fancy at all. He has access to this terrific yacht that belongs to his uncle, and he takes it out a couple of times a year.”
“Sounds terrific. Reggie going to be there?”
“Will tells me he was flying to Boston for a couple of days. I’m not expecting him.”
“I’ll think about it, the water and fresh air might be enough to soothe my soul.”
