Page 12 of Vacations from Hell


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“Or gotten attacked by vampires,” Liz says, winking.

Hailey laughs. “Will you guys be around later?”

“Yup,” I say.

“Cool.”

“We’ll be at the casino,” Liz says, reclining in her seat again. “Meet us at nine.”

“Great. Thanks.”

“Wait, Hailey?” I ask. “Are you finished with the Eagle?”

“Yup. You want it?”

“Yeah, if you don’t mind.”

She tosses it on my chair. “Enjoy.”

Liz snickers as I open the paper.

“It’s not funny,” I say, reading the details. “It says there have been seven disappearances on six different cruise ships in the past year. Two people were found in the water, drained of blood. Drained of blood! Aren’t you even a little bit worried?”

“Gimme a break. It’s the Eagle. Hello, there’s no such thing as vampires, remember? Anyway, you’re transferring your anxiety from what you’re really afraid of.”

“And what’s that?”

She gives me a knowing look. “You know. Losing it.”

“Thank you, Dr. Laura. But I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” I flip over in my lounge chair, turning my back to her.

“Are you hungry?” she asks a few minutes later.

“No,” I say, still mad.

“Stop being a baby,” she says. “I’m starving. I’ll get us something to eat. Let me find Jarred.”

“Hailey says I should have called dibs.”

“Hey, he’s all yours if you want him,” she offers.

“No, you go ahead. I don’t want your charity. I’ll find my own guy.” I take a deep breath of ocean air. “Promise.”

Liz and I meet Hailey at the casino later that night, by a James Bond slot machine. If I put in a quarter, will a gorgeous spy pop out?

“You two look amazing,” Hailey says.

“So do you,” I say. She does look very pretty in a simple black cotton dress.

“Oh, please, you guys look like you’re going to a Manhattan gala, and I look like I’m going to a school dance.” She admires the purple strapless dress Liz forced me into and Liz’s glamorous backless red sheath. “Can I come raid your closet?”

“Anytime,” Liz says, fixing the strap on her shoe. “And you smell great. What perfume is that?”

Hailey smiles. “Thanks! It’s called Parfum de Vie.”

“Very yummy.”

“How’s your mom?” I ask.

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