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I stood in line to pay. A few people glanced my way. The cashier looked at me strangely when I put the test down to pay for it. I didn’t give a shit. I was here for a reason, and it was my business. There were no laws against men buying pregnancy tests.
When I finally left the store, I headed back to Rena’s apartment and let myself in with the keys I’d taken. I opened the front door and put the keys back where I found them before carrying my packet of treasure to the bedroom.
“What did you get?” Rena asked. She was sitting up in bed when I walked into the room, and she had color in her cheeks again. She looked much better, and I was relieved.
I reached into the bag without answering her and produced the pregnancy test.
Rena’s features darkened. “That’s not funny,” she said.
“It’s worth a shot. You’ve been throwing up. If it’s negative, that’s one less thing to worry about.”
She stared at the pregnancy test. “I don’t know if I can do this,” she whispered.
“I’ll be right here,” I said. “No matter what.” And I meant it. Rena looked up at me with those big brown puppy eyes, and my heart went out to her. Whatever it was she was going to go through, we would deal with it together. I vowed to myself that wouldn’t leave her to struggle alone.
Rena sighed and walked to the bathroom. She closed the door, and I waited in the room. It felt like forever before she opened the door again.
“We have to wait a few minutes,” she said.
I groaned. She sat next to me, twisting her hands together, fidgeting. She was nervous. I put my hands on hers and calmed her.
“It’s going to be all right,” I said.
Rena nodded, but I didn’t think she believed me.
It felt like another million years passed before it was time to check the test. Rena walked to the bathroom and brought the test out.
“I can’t bear to look at it,” she admitted. “Do it with me?”
I nodded. She took a deep breath and turned the test over so we would both see the results. In blue ink, in the small box provided, the test read “Pregnant.”
I glanced up at Rena. She had gone pale. She looked like she was going to faint, so I jumped up and guided her to sit down on the bed.
“This can’t be happening,” Rena said in a dull voice.
“It’s going to be okay.”
Rena shook her head. “I’m not ready for a baby. My life is perfect the way it is right now. I can’t do this.”
I put my arm around her and pulled her closer to me.
“This isn’t what I wanted,” Rena said to me. “You understand that, right?”
I nodded. It hadn’t been planned at all. But sometimes, shit happened. And apparently, it happened even to the cream of the crop. I was rich and well-known in the business world, I made logical decisions, and I had still had a condom rip. I had still gotten a woman pregnant.
“Listen to me,” I said. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you. I will be there for you, no matter what. We’ll make this work. Together.”
Rena shook her head. “You don’t get it. I’m about to meet my sister, a person I didn’t know existed a few days ago because my mom didn’t want me and gave me up for adoption. And now? How can I do the same thing without a guilty conscience?”
“You’re not thinking of giving the baby up, are you?”
Rena covered her face with her hands. “I don’t know what I’m thinking.” Her voice was muffled through her fingers. I had to admit, I had no idea what I was thinking, either. This hadn’t been a part of the plan. I wasn’t panicking, but this scared the shit out of me in a lot of ways.
But I couldn't just let her give the baby up. I wanted to be a part of it all. I didn’t know why or how. Where had the sentiment come from?
What I did know was that I wanted to try to do this, if I could. I wasn’t the type to commit, but this was different.
Chapter 23
Rena
This was too much for me to deal with. What the hell was I supposed to do? I wasn’t ready for a baby. I wasn’t ready to be pregnant. And what about Brent? He was stuck with me forever if I kept the baby. He would have to be in my life somehow. That was unfair on him, especially after he’d said he would call it quits at some point.
