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If I could go back, I wouldn’t have left Luna… or I would have thrown her over my shoulder and taken her with me…
Luna
I’ve never been more relieved in my life to have Joshua standing in front of me. My hands go to the side of his face, and I hold him just like that for a second so I can look at him and then I wrap him up in possibly the strongest hug I’ve ever given him in my life—even tighter than the one I gave him when he was six and staying with Mom for the day. He ran away from home because he didn’t like that I was working all the time.
“Thank God you’re okay,” I murmur, breathing in his sweet scent.
“Mom, what’s going on?”
“It’s probably just a prank, but it scared me. I’m sorry if I interrupted your night.”
“Are you hurt?”
“I just stepped on some glass.”
“Glass?”
“Someone broke the living room window out, Josh. Your mom is okay, though. She was just worried about you,” Ben explains, coming back to stand beside me, his arm moving over my shoulder.
I’m thankful for his support. I’m so scattered. Fear over what’s happened along with the strange interaction I’ve had with Gavin are all combined and has my nerves frazzled.
“Do you know who did it?”
“Not yet, Josh, but I’ll find out,” Ben promises.
“I’ll just be going,” Gavin says, coming out from the hall. His face looks somber and he looks really out of place. I could almost feel sorry for him, if he wasn’t messing with my brain. We said our goodbyes thirteen years ago and when I needed him most he wouldn’t even respond. I need to remember that. I feel Ben’s hand on my shoulder, massaging it reassuringly.
He’s what I need.
He cares about me and Joshua. He’ll give Joshua that male presence in his life that has always been missing.
“I think that’s for the best, Gavin,” Ben states coolly. “As you can see, I’m here to make sure Luna and Josh are safe.”
Part of me thinks that’s harsh, but he’s only telling the truth. Gavin passed on the right to be a part of mine and Joshua’s life long ago. Besides, it’s not like Gavin has swooped in vowing to be here and begging for forgiveness for walking out all those years ago. He’s only mentioned friendship. With my emotions and thoughts frazzled as they are, that’s not a good idea for me. So I don’t respond.
“Gavin?” Joshua says turning around. My heart stops. Gavin looks down at him and my heart feels like it stops mid beat.
“You know who I am?” Gavin notes, sounding surprised.
“Yeah, I know all about you,” Joshua replies harshly, and I never realized how bitter he was until right this second. “Why are you here?”
“I’m here to investigate a murder.”
“I guess you won’t be staying long,” Joshua says, and his voice sounds stiff, but I can hear the pain in it, and I hurt for my son. Part of me is hoping Gavin will try to keep talking to Joshua and part of me is just wanting him to leave.
“Atticus tell you about me?” Gavin asks. I frown, trying to decide if I should step in.
“No. Mom did,” Joshua deadpans. He stares at Gavin for a solid minute and then tears his gaze away to look at me. “Can I go to my room now, Mom?”
I look at Ben and he nods. “I checked the upstairs earlier, it’s secure.”
I give him a tight smile and then brush my fingers through Joshua’s hair. “Go on, Baby. I’ll be up in a bit to check on you.”
“Okay.” He turns to look at Gavin and my heart hurts, but he doesn’t say anything else to him. He just walks up the stairs. I watch him until he is out of site and then my gaze is locked with Gavin’s. I’m full of pain, and I know that reflects in my face. Gavin? I don’t know how to read the look on his face, but something about it sends chills of warning down my spine.
Luna
I stare at the door Gavin just left out of and it feels like my heart has fallen into the pit of my stomach. I thought he would have tried to reach out to Joshua, thought he might talk to me even, but he didn’t.
I don’t know why I expected that, but I did. The fact that he just left without a word, not even a goodbye, burns as bitter as my last words with him when I was in the hospital with Joshua.
I went upstairs and saw to my boy, and once I made sure he was okay—or at least as best as could be expected—I came back down to Ben. He’d somehow put plywood over the window and cleaned up the room. He’s a good man. A man I should fight to hold on to….
