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At his point, I had to tell him the truth because if not, he was probably going to murder my ass.
“That’s my name,” I said, barely above a whisper.
“Oh wow! And you told me your name was Monica! So, it’s true, you planned on robbing me last night?” he asked.
Although he asked me, I knew that he knew the answer but he just wanted to hear me say it.
“Yes, but let me explain,” I said.
“I don’t want to hear shit that you have to say. Get the fuck up and get out my house before I change my mind about killing you!” he said.
I didn’t budge. I wanted to tell him the truth.
“Wait, Davion, just hear me out. Last night was going to be my last night doing this shit, I swear. I was going to leave town because I can’t keep living like this, this shit is dangerous. The person that was texting my phone is the one that’s making me do it. I confessed to him yesterday that I wanted out and he punched me in my face for it. I promise that last night I was going to have you drive to the motel that we are currently staying at and go to our room. He was going to be waiting for you in there and after he robbed you, I was going to wait for him to go to sleep and then I was going to leave! Just like how you saw something in me last night, I saw something in you! Which is why I didn’t go forward with the plan. You have to believe me, Davion, it’s the truth,” I cried to him.
I don’t think that I have ever cried in my life because I was so fuckin’ heartless.
“You’re way too fuckin’ beautiful to be living this lifestyle. I want to believe you, I really do, but I just can’t. How you expect for a nigga to believe anything that’s even coming out of your mouth right now when you didn’t even keep it real from the get go?” he asked.
“I was scared, okay! Scared that you would judge me, like you’re judging me now,” I said, still crying.
“I ain’t in no fuckin’ position to judge anybody. I done did some fucked up shit in my life too, and I’m man enough to say that shit because ain’t nobody perfect, so I’m not afraid of what the fuck somebody else may think of me,” he said.
I only wished that I had his courage.
“I want to be able to open up to you, Davion. Please, don’t make me leave because I have nowhere else to go. All of my things are in Miami, and I told you that I planned to take his car and go back home last night. I’ll help out at the club if you allow me to. I’ll find me a job, whatever I have to do, just please don’t kick me out because if Tracy’s finds me, he just might kill my ass,” I said to him.
“Get up and get dressed!” he said, and I quickly did that.
This was a good thing because from the sound of it, I think he was going to let me stay.
Chapter 18: Jaquan
I was in the middle of a press conference and this shit was very important because last night, myself, Dre, and Quay decided to have a little after party at one of the hotels. We were in Tallahassee for homecoming week and we had a performance that night at Club Coliseum. Whenever I had to do a performance, I loved coming to Tally because those college students be lit as hell, and I could feel the love right off the bat. Half the students that attended Famu and Florida State were from Miami, so the love they had for me is real. Charlie’s ass was still pissed off with a nigga, so she didn’t come, but Toya came with Dre, since Florida State was her school and she wanted to be down for homecoming weekend as well.
Anyway, two girls got into an altercation back at the hotel room, which resulted in one of the females being beat with a glass bottle. She was now laid up in the hospital and had to get stiches and shit in her face. Since the party was ours, we had to come out and tell the story, and mainly apologize for the shit that happened, even though the shit wasn’t technically our fault. I swear this was the only part I hated about being famous because your ass had to apologize for every damn thing.
“That was a mistake on our part, and we should have stopped it before it went that far. I never want my fans to think that we support that type of violence and that it’s acceptable, so again, I sincerely apologize,” I said.
As soon as I finished giving my speech, the double doors opened in the room. This press conference was in the middle of going live and anybody couldn’t just walk into the room while it was going on, but the person who had just walked in wasn’t just anybody. This was someone who played a big role in the way that I am today. Someone who had scarred me for life and pushed me to want to become the best father in the world to my daughter. This was the man who caused my mother to have to struggle while I was growing up because she didn’t have anybody there to help her raise me. This was him, the deadbeat that I rap about in my music. The man who felt like I wasn’t worthy enough to receive his love. If I were, he never would’ve left me to learn how to be a man on my own. This was the same man who I watched my little sister cry over time and time again because she never got the chance to be spoiled and be labeled as a “daddy’s girl”. This was the third time that I had seen him in my entire life, but hey, who was counting?
“I’m sorry, sir, but you can’t be in here right now,” one of the people from the press said.
I mean, we were literally in the middle of recording and he had come in there and messed things up.
“That’s my son!” he said. He said it with power, like it meant something. Like he took part in my success.
“Jaquan, do you know this man? If not, we’re going to have to ask him to leave,” the security guard said.
It was kind of a tricky question that she was asking me because, did I know this man? The man who was standing before me, looking like an older version of myself, could I honestly claim to know him? He was standing there in a suit and it was like he was begging me with his eyes to confess to him being my father.
“No, I don’t know that man! I never had a father,” I said with hate dripping from every word that I said.
I left the podium and Dre followed me. I could hear my sperm donor yelling out for security to let him go as I walked away. I needed a moment to get my thoughts together. How dare he come in here and claim me after all these years? How dare he! I was so fuckin’ mad that I punched a hole in the wall. Paparazzi and press were all around, and I was giving their asses a show.
“Quan, let’s go. I understand you’re mad, but don’t give these motha fuckas a reason to have a field day with this shit you doing out here right now. You’ll wake up tomorrow and they’ll have all type of false accusations on you, talking about how violent of a person you are, and they’ll even bring Charlie and China into it. Come on, man, this shit ain’t a good look,” Quay said when he came out of the press conference and saw how I was out there acting.
I got myself together and the three of us headed outside. When we walked out, he was still standing there. It was like he was waiting for me or some shit.
