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Here it was 1 p.m. and I was late for my 12:30 appointment. I was mad at myself for allowing myself to get white girl wasted last night when I knew damn well I had work to go to the next day. And Ty didn’t make it any better by coming in the house and fuckin’ the shit out of me like that. Anyways, I decided to wear my orange and white tie-dye True Religion shorts with the orange True shirt to match. I wore my hair flat ironed, parted down the middle, and flowing down my back with my cute orange sandals that I’d just bought last week from Steve Madden.
As I was searching through my closet to see which purse I wanted to wear, Ty came barging in the room yelling,” Where you think you going with them little ass shorts on?”
“I’m going to work, now move because I’m already late,” I yelled as I shoved him out of the way.
He grabbed me around my waist and said, “G shit Lani, take those shorts off now.” I looked at my husband and put a sad face on so hopefully he would let me keep them on. I mean damn, I paid $300 for them damn shorts. He came up to me and kissed me on the lips and said, “Lani baby I didn’t mean to yell at you but I hate the way them niggas look at you when you wear shorts, so bae just throw on something different. Wear the True Religion jeans I bought you last week.” I told my husband okay as I changed into something different.
I made my way downstairs to see my girls in the kitchen drinking coffee. “Y’all bitches just now getting up?” I said as I got an apple from the fruit bowl in the kitchen.
Tisha spoke first and said, “Yeah that Cîroc ain’t no joke.” Everybody busted out laughing at her silly ass.
Tamika looked at my outfit and said, “You look cute Lani, but why you didn’t wear the shorts that you just bought the other day?”
“Because I told her to take them the fuck off,” Ty said as
he came in the kitchen and smacked me on the ass. All my girls burst out laughing because they knew how overprotective Ty was over me.
“That’s not funny,” I told them as I grabbed my purse to leave. “Are y’all bitches coming in the shop today or no?” I asked as we all stood outside getting ready to leave in our separate directions.
“Yes, we’ll be there,” my girls said, getting into their vehicles.
“Alright bae, I love you and be safe. I’ll be there later to bring you lunch. What you want today?” Tyrone said as he helped me climb up in my car.
I kissed him and just said, “I love you too and it doesn’t matter baby. Just bring me back something.”
Walking into Bangs, I just knew today was going to be a busy and hectic day. As soon as I walked in I spotted my 12:30 appointment Britney sitting there waiting for me. “Hey girl,” I said as I told her to come take a seat in my chair. “I’m sorry for running late. I was up drinking last night with crazy ass Tamika, Tisha, and Kyra.”
“That’s okay girl, I just got here not too long ago,” Britney told me as she passed me her three packs of ‘20, ‘22, and ‘24-inch Saga Remy Yaki hair. I don’t know why Britney chose to put weave in her hair when her hair is just as long as mine.
“So, what you getting today Brit?” I asked as I put the cape over her so that I could get started.
“I want to try something different. Since I always get the part down the middle, let me get a Chinese bang this time,” Britney said as she showed me the picture in her iPhone of how she wanted her hair. I love Chinese bangs, especially when they are done the right way. I hate to see girls walking around with the uneven bang. Somebody should kick whoever ass fucked up their hair like that.
As I was finishing putting the last few braids in Britney’s hair so that I could start the sew in, in walked my three bitches Tisha, Tamika, and Kyra. Even when my girls and I come to work we still dress to impress. Kyra was sporting her pink and white Adidas sweat suit with the shoes to match. She had her hair up in a high white girl ponytail with the big earrings like New-New had on in ATL. Tamika had on a pretty ass blue and gold Versace sundress with the gold sandals to match. I had the same dress but in pink. My girl Tisha was wearing a long black maxi dress with her whole back out and her hair was in a tight bun to show off her pretty face.
“Y’all finally made it I see, with y’all late asses,” I said as my girls came over to me to give me a hug. My girls started laughing as they headed to their stations to get started with their appointments. An hour later I was finally finished with Britney’s hair and she was looking like that bitch. After her I started on my girl Sky, who just wanted a natural wrap with her real hair.
Things around the shop were going pretty good when these two ugly bitches came in mean mugging the hell out of me in my place of business. I’ve been running this salon for the past three years and I had never seen these bitches a day in my life. One of my stylists, Peaches, with his gay self walked over in whispered in my ear, “Lani, you know them girls? Because they looking at you like they got beef!” I shook my head and told Peaches I’ve never seen these bitches a day in my life.
Both girls walked over to me while I was holding the curling iron in my hand. “Let these bitches start acting stupid and I’ma burn both of their asses,” I said to myself as I prepared myself for whatever was coming my way. One of the girls spoke up first. She reminded me of Li’l Kim, in her younger days. She had the mole on her top lip and everything.
“Where Tyrone at?” she asked me as she rubbed her hand on her stomach. I had to calm myself down because who was this off-brand bitch coming into my salon asking about my husband’s whereabouts? I looked at the ratchet bitch, rolled my eyes, and said, “ It’s going on 4 o’clock, so he’s probably on his way over with my lunch to make sure his wife eats.” I said wife with much emphasis and I made sure to show her the big rock on my finger as I flipped my right hand over my shoulder. The bitch had the nerve to tell me to tell my husband to call her because it was very important. It took almost everybody in that bitch to get me off of her. Just that quick I punched her ass right in the mouth and my girls came over to put in work on her friend as I handled Li’l Kim.
Chapter 4: Tyrone
I've done did a lot of shit just to live this here lifestyle. We came straight from the bottom, to the top, my lifestyle. I was blasting Young Thug’s “Lifestyle” as I was cruising through Miami in my all black Ferrari F430 Spider. I was on my way to drop off my wife’s lunch before she started calling me telling me to hurry my ass up. I decided to go to this new spot called Finga Licking out in North Miami. All the celebrities go there, from Trina to Rick Ross and the whole Young Money crew. I got Lani the fried lobster, shrimp, and seafood rice. Her ass better eat it all too because she been talking about going there for the past few weeks.
As I was pulling up to the salon, it looked like there was a lot of commotion going on inside. I was shocked because Lani always has this place in check. From what I could see it looked like they were in there fighting. When I walked inside I saw my wife on top of Ashley, this ho I use to mess around with. Lani was beating the hell out of that bitch. After standing there for a few seconds, I rushed over to pick my wife up from off the floor.
“Ty you just gon’ let her beat the mother of your child like that?” Ashley said as she held her nose because of the bleeding.
“Mother of my child? What the fuck you talking about bitch?” I said as I put Lani back down.
“So you got this ho pregnant?” Lani said as she hauled off and slapped the shit out of me. I had to control her because them little hands hitting me in my face was starting to hurt.
“Man Ka’lani you can’t believe this bird,” I said as I pointed at Ashley. Before I knew it Ashley reached in her purse and threw a pregnancy test with two double lines at me.
“Calm yo ass down,” I said to Lani as we came inside her office towards the back of the shop so that we could have some privacy. At this point my wife was fired up. She was walking around her office mumbling some shit that I couldn’t even understand. I gave her a few minutes to cool down before I started telling her what was up.
