AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“It’s been a while, Jay. More than two years.”
“I don’t want or need any of it.” Jay wriggled from the man’s grasp. His words, though, were strangled by a catch in his throat.
Caleb’s jacket, his hair—the scent, the intoxicating scent was everywhere.
“Really?” Caleb moved in front of him. “I don’t have just tablets this time.”
Jay’s heart beat faster.
“Liar.”
He veered left, but Caleb moved in front of him, blocking his path. The man reached into his jacket and withdrew a pipe and pouch, large enough to hold a small lamp as well.
The breath left Jay’s body. The pipe. Not mere Dover Powder, but pure opium, real opium. He resisted closing his eyes, but the memory, the sounds growing quiet, the height, the weightlessness, the state he’d entered that first time, so many years before sung to him. To be like that again, to exist but not exist—the laudanum he’d procured on his own couldn’t even hold a candle, no matter how many tablets he took.
No.
He couldn’t, he wouldn’t. How much could there be in that little burlap bag anyway? A few days’ worth? After that, what, back to cheap substitutes? Caleb would be on a ship and his cousins and all their employees were under strict orders not to give or sell him anything.
“This is a rare opportunity, Jay.”
His muscles clenched. Caleb was always so familiar, wasn’t he? Especially with him on the ropes.
“I don’t need it.”
He didn’t. He really didn’t, except he did. He hadn’t really slept in, what, two years? Ever since they put him in that place. The memories of that torture would never leave and the past six months on his own were their own kind of Hell.
“Of course, you don’t.” Caleb inched closer. “You can smell it, can’t you? I see your nose twitching, and your fingers. You’re ready to reach for your purse.”
Jay balled his fists. Oh, to punch the smug little man. He could refuse, he could.
“I don’t.” He made his voice firm. “I’m engaged now, or haven’t you heard?”
Caleb threw back his head and laughed. “If there ever was a reason to buy some that’d be it. You’ll never be able to settle down. You’ll need a double dose to deal with the shrill cries from your wife and her constant hounding.”
“Someone doesn’t like women much.” Jay raised an eyebrow and smirked at the scowl on Caleb’s face. One point for him.
“I like no one, only money, which is why I’m good at my job.” Caleb’s voice was steady though his eyes still blazed.
“Well, you won’t get mine tonight.” Jay pushed to the right.
The scent wafted again. The room spun.
No. Urs. Think of Urs.
He had to be on his game for Urs. He’d promised her. Though if he could sleep he’d perform better.
No.
He would keep on the ground now, but—his stomach clenched. Now was temporary.
The doctors’ warnings rang in his head, but the whispers, the promises, grew louder and louder. He could control himself. He’d just purchase it now and use it later. Nothing would matter then anyway and he’d be how he wanted to be. And he could sleep—a deep, floating sleep without worry, or responsibilities or chances to fail.
Possession of the instruments was necessary and prudent at this juncture. He wouldn’t have a better opportunity and it came from the best source. Truitt—now Hale—was the largest, most reputable supplier in America. This was a reasonable course of action. There was nothing wrong with just purchasing.
He leaned forward. Blast, he hated giving the man the satisfaction, but there was no choice, was there?
“How much?”
