AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I nodded, chewing my bottom lip. I averted my gaze to the carpet. "I have too much to lose. I didn't want to chance it."
Kova began wrapping up my ankle with the ice and the towel. "Ya tak ponimayu, chto chuystyuyu sebya slishkom," he mumbled in Russian under his breath.
"What did you say?"
He shook his head and looked at my foot. "I understand that feeling all too well." Kova glanced away and leaned back, then rubbed his square jaw. He took off his hat, shook it out, and put it back on. He was anxious. I could feel it in his touch when he gently picked up my foot and placed it in his lap.
He repeated what he’d said in Russian, then looked straight into my eyes. My heart fluttered. I had a feeling I knew where this was going.
"Just that I know that feeling of being scared and having too much to lose. I understand you. Proklyatyy, yesli vy sdelayete, proklyatyy, yesli vy etogo ne sdelayete. Damned if you do, damned if you do not. What the heart wants does not matter, it all causes pain in the end. You are fucked either way, Adrianna, so you try to make the best decision you can knowing that neither choice was the one you wanted." He paused, and tilted his head to the side. "Do you have any Russian in you?"
"Not that I'm aware of. Why?"
"Because Russian women go hand in hand with love and pain."
There was so much more going on between the lines than just my Achilles that all I could do was stare back into his pensive eyes and agree. I knew he was trying to tell me more. I'd yet to give him the opportunity to explain himself, but that was because I felt like he’d made his choice and that was that. He could have spoken to me before he did anything, but he chose not to.
But now I wasn't so sure if the choice he'd made was the choice he’d wanted, or one he had been forced to make. I felt the same way with Coach Elena. I knew it was almost time for me to finally be ready to hear what he had to say. I could feel the door opening, and my biggest worry now was that I'd made the wrong choice and kept it closed for so long, sitting alone in the dark.
After my ankle was wrapped up in ice, we sat quietly on my couch for close to an hour. Kova used an app on his phone to watch the Russian news, and I debated whether I should call Avery like I’d told her I would. Knowing I'd need more time, I just scrolled through various social media apps and caught up on her life, along with my brother's and my dad’s.
If Avery wasn't smiling in her photos, she was giving her best duck face I always made fun of. She had the most compelling, crystal-blue eyes that burst with energy. In one photo, she had a high, perfectly placed and super cute ponytail, Aviator sunglasses that actually fit her small face, frayed jean shorts that revealed supermodel legs, and a plain white shirt tied at the side. She was standing on the beach with two girls holding ice cream cones. It was one of those moving images. Waves reversed in the background as the girls moved their heads to the side while laughing and licking the ice cream. She looked happy, and I smiled, missing her, but my smile vanished and my brows bunched together when I viewed the next couple of photos.
Avery looked so far away, her gaze distant, and so damn sad that I actually felt bad for her. Her eyes were lifeless. No sparkle. No joy. Her vivacious personality was gone and that upset me. There was no sass and life surrounding her anymore.
That wasn't Avery. She needed me and I'd blown her off. I regretted my actions big time now.
The sound of fireworks going off in the distance caught my attention again. I sat up and looked through the sliding glass door.
"Okay. My toes are frozen solid and I can't feel a thing. Let's get this ice off my leg. I heard fireworks and I want to go outside to see if I can see them," I said, full of excitement. Kova laughed and sat up to unwrap my leg. Just as I was about to put my phone down, a new photo of Avery posted. I quickly viewed and read the caption.
When in doubt, add more sparkles.
I smiled, my heart a little lighter for her. It was another one of those moving images, only it was just a sparkler that flickered against the moonlight. Another hand slid in from the side holding a second sparkler. It tapped the top of hers.
I could tell instantly by the tattoo on the wrist that it was my brother’s hand.
* * *
Looking at Kova’s open palm, I said, "It's okay. I got it."
He ignored me and kept his hand out, waving his fingers, silently telling me to take his hand. "I know you do, but I want to help."
Being stuck in one position too long had wreaked havoc on my body after the training I’d endured. I didn't want his help—I wanted to be strong enough to do it on my own—but I was going to need it to stand up and possibly take a step or two to loosen up, especially because of my foot.
"Sometimes you can be a gentleman," I said, leaning on him.
"Chivalry is not yet dead."
A laughed erupted from me. "You would say that."
We stepped outside onto my patio and Kova glanced around. "I had no idea how big your terrace was."
"Oh, you know my dad. He spares no expense when it comes to building."
Kova was still surprised. "You could live out here." I followed his gaze. There was a double lounge on one side of the deck, and a bistro set on the other side. And at the far end where it wrapped around to my room was a swinging chair.
I chuckled. "That would require me to be home more often."
