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I shook my head, baffled, as he dropped his weight to mine. I tried to move him away so I could get answers, but Kova was quick and pulled both my hands above my head and secured them to the bed in his grip. His other hand glided up my thigh to my ribs. In seconds, his mouth found my neck and his tongue licked a wet trail. All sensible thoughts left my mind when he pulled my tender skin into his mouth and suckled hard. My back arched and a gasp of bliss escaped my lips. His tongue was flat and moving in slow sensual circles. My body shivered and my eyes rolled shut as pleasure hummed through me. He feverously peppered kissed along my jaw until his lips met mine.
"I don't understand. What are you talking about?" I managed to get out.
But Kova didn't stop the torment when he said, "Katja. The marriage."
"What?" I asked, yanking away in breathless anticipation. "What changed? I don’t understand."
"We had an argument and she slipped up. Do you remember when I told you I thought she was up to something? I found out everything she was hiding. There is so much to tell."
Jaw trembling, I said, "Kova, I can't give my life up for you, though. I'm sorry, but I just can't."
As selfish as that sounded, if I wouldn't give it up for my kidneys, then I wouldn't for Kova.
"You do not understand," he said. He pulled me to sit on his lap and I placed my hands on his chest, feeling the warmth come off him. "I am not asking you to give anything up, I would never do that. I will wait for however long it takes for you to be mine."
I shook my head in disbelief. Tears clouded my vision. "But why? Why? What if we can never be?"
"You will be a legal adult one day, so you will not have to report to anyone. What we have is something people search their entire life for. You understand me, I understand you. Do you honestly think a coach and an athlete have never fallen in love? It has happened more times than you can imagine. A coach knows more about his athlete than anyone."
"But, Kova, I'm only seventeen."
"I know," he said softly, brushing a lock of hair behind my ear. "And even though I am thirty-three, I will wait for you. However long it takes, I will wait because I love you and I want us to be together one day."
Stupid tears fell from the corners of my eyes. I didn't even know why I was crying, but I was, and they started coming out faster. A gentle smile formed on his full lips. His kissable lips.
Kova wiped my tears. I shook my head, staring at his chest. "I just don't understand."
"Love does not ever makes sense. You just go with what your heart feels. The way you look at me, the pain of wanting something you cannot have, I know that look because I feel the same for you. I know it is there for you, even if you do not tell me."
I chewed on my bottom lip and glanced up to meet his eyes. The corner of my lips tugged up. "I may…"
His lips formed a huge smile. "Admitting you are in love with someone is much harder than it sounds. The most important things in our lives are the hardest to get out. Is this why you do not like to admit your love for me? Because I am important? I did not say I love you for you to say it back, but I can feel it in your touch, the way you grip my skin, the way you reach for me. I know what you feel in your beautiful heart without you having to say it."
I took a deep breat
h, and asked, "Can I ask what your argument was about?"
"Oh, so much. It was like a domino effect and it could not have pleased me more. After I learned she was pushing for the marriage to get her citizenship, I read an email between her and a friend. Her friend encouraged her to take what she can get out of me. I knew she loved money, just not that much. Even before you came around, I always gave her what she wanted without questioning her. Money is just money. But it hurt to see she was using me for both."
My brows bunched together. "She still doesn't have her citizenship? I assumed she did."
"No, she is on the faster track to receive one, but she still does not have it. Without marriage, it would take much longer for her. The last person we spoke to said she should have it in a year or so."
There had to be more. "What else?"
"I had the strangest feeling she had been cheating on me."
My eyes softened. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and pulled him down to me. I kissed his lips and couldn't help it, but I smiled at him.
"You can’t possibly be upset if she was cheating on you, Kova."
"I know what I do is wrong, and I feel bad about it, but I never, ever used her. I love her, Ria, I always will, but I will never love her the way I do you."
"So, let me get this straight. You're divorcing her because of the citizenship and because you think she cheated?"
Kova dragged his teeth over his bottom lip and averted his gaze. His hands skimmed my thighs and over my hips, the tips of his fingers slipped under my tank top. Leaning in, he pressed a kiss to my chest.
"What is it?" I asked, my voice shaky. My chest rose and fell faster and harder with anticipation.
