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Her heart threatening to jump into her throat, Marianne murmured, ‘No, please have it back,’ as she tried to hand the jacket to him. ‘You’ll be cold yourself.’
‘Me? Never.’ He adjusted the jacket more firmly round her shoulders. ‘I’m a very warm-blooded animal,’ he said, straight-faced.
‘Lucky you,’ she returned brightly, purposely ignoring the sexual innuendo. ‘I can be cold on the warmest nights. I’m probably the only person in the world who carries a hot-water bottle in their luggage on holiday, just in case.’
The firm mouth curved. ‘A hot-water bottle?’ he murmured softly. ‘There are other ways to be warm in bed.’
He had undone the top button of his shirt and loosened his bow-tie so it hung either side of his collar when he’d removed his jacket and it wasn’t helping her equilibrium one bit. ‘Perhaps,’ she said primly. She determinedly changed the subject by adding, ‘Some of the yachts in the harbour are truly amazing, aren’t they? Do you like sailing or water sports?’
‘I like all sorts of sports, Marianne.’ He pulled her to a standstill, slipping an arm round her waist as they stood together looking down into the bay.
She knew the casual flirting was just part of the evening and normally such banter on a date was fun, but this wasn’t a date in that sense and for the life of her she didn’t know how to respond to him. Then, still gazing over the water and his voice now quiet and without amusement, he said, ‘A few days ago you asked me if I loved my wife when I married her. The truthful answer to that would be that I loved the person I thought she was, but in reality she couldn’t have been more different. From the moment we met she projected an image she thought I wanted and it worked. It worked very well. She reeled me in and I never suspected a thing.’
Marianne barely breathed. She sensed from the way he was speaking that he rarely talked like this, if ever.
‘By the time I found out that Fiona didn’t confine her sexual activities to our bed alone, probably every damn person in a fifty-mile radius except me knew. It was an…informative experience.’
Her voice barely audible, she whispered, ‘I’m sorry.’
‘It was a long time ago, Marianne. It taught me plenty, so in one way I should be grateful. I paid my way out of my mistake and there were no threads like kids to complicate matters. I swore then I would never marry again.’
She turned to face him for the first time. ‘Why are you telling me all this, Rafe?’
‘I don’t know,’ he said, with such boyish bemusement it wrenched at her heartstrings. ‘I just want to…’ he paused, shaking his head ‘…make it plain how I feel, I guess. Commitment, forever, family, it isn’t for me. I’ve tried it once and once was enough. Oh, I don’t mean I’m not monogamous when I’m seeing someone, that’s something entirely different. I give and expect absolute fidelity. But when it’s time to move on I like to think friendship replaces intimacy with no hard feelings on both sides.’
Although he had turned to face her, his features were in shadow because the lights were behind him. Was he propositioning her? Marianne asked herself dazedly. Was that it? Laying out his rules so she knew exactly where she would stand if she started a relationship with him? Which was nowhere, apparentl
y. Quelling the rising anger, she said coolly, ‘And there are women who accept those terms? Who like what is little more than an emotionless lay?’ It was crude but, in the circumstances, she felt justified.
He stiffened. ‘A healthy friendship and respect for each other’s independence between two members of the opposite sex is hardly that.’
‘But—and correct me if I’m wrong here—the healthy friendship and respect scenario always includes sex?’ Marianne asked, unable to prevent the tartness from sounding in her voice.
He stared at her, steely-eyed. ‘You are deliberately misunderstanding what I’m saying.’
‘On the contrary, Rafe. I think I understand you very well. We agreed a few days ago we are attracted to each other in a physical sense. This is the next step. Right?’
‘No, of course not.’ He watched her face as disbelief battled with anger, and he could have kicked himself. What the hell was he doing?
Everything he’d promised himself he wouldn’t.
‘Good, because let me make one thing perfectly clear,’ Marianne said, ice in her crisp tone. ‘I have absolutely no intention of sleeping with you now or at any time in the future. There may well be plenty of women out there who are grateful for the privilege of having you in their bed, but I’m not one of them. OK? No one can guarantee anything when they start dating someone, I know that, but to enter a relationship with no expectations of commitment or possibility that it might be serious doesn’t fit in with who I am. Just so you know.’
‘Fine.’ How to kill something stone dead in one easy lesson, he told himself bitterly. He looked at her standing so tensely in front of him, her small chin tilted in a way he was coming to recognise meant indomitability, and for a moment the temptation to backtrack, to refuse everything he had just said was strong. It was enough for him to sense the sticky coils of heart involvement closing round him and it frightened him to death. His voice cold, he said, ‘I’m glad we’ve cleared the air and know where we stand. Shall we get back to the others if you’re cold?’
Whipping the jacket from her shoulders, Marianne handed it to him and turned on her heel. She had only gone a yard or two when he caught at her arm, swinging her to face him. ‘I’m sorry, OK?’ he said, his voice gentler. ‘Look, for what it’s worth, I know you’re the sort of woman who wouldn’t be satisfied with a short affair, or even a long one, come to that. But the women I date—it suits them, Marianne. It’s a two-way thing, believe me. I told you how I feel because I wanted to make it clear. That’s all.’
‘Well, you have.’
He could see she wasn’t going to be mollified and in truth he couldn’t blame her. Even a lad still wet behind the ears would have made a better job of this evening than him. The trouble was, she was like a drug and he couldn’t get enough of her. He had never wanted a woman so badly without bedding her. Correction. He had never wanted a woman so badly full stop, he told himself grimly, and he was sick of cold showers at three and four in the morning. The best thing he could do was to get his butt back to the States and put an ocean between them. He knew of more than one woman who would appreciate his candour about his intentions, even if he wasn’t a man who made promises.
‘I shall be leaving the day after tomorrow. Is there any chance I can leave knowing we’re still friends or have I blown it?’ he asked, deliberately adopting a meekness he hoped would defuse the situation.
He saw the deep brown eyes weigh him up. ‘You can’t charm your way out of this,’ she said reprovingly.
Detecting a slight softening in her manner, he took a chance and kissed her lightly on her delectable nose. She would never know the control it took when every nerve and sinew was aching to feel her body against his and her mouth open beneath his lips. ‘Business all the way from here. How does that sound? And don’t forget there are two other people in this equation. Crystal and my father would find it uncomfortable if we’re at each other’s throats, don’t you think?’ he asked with unrepentant persuasion.
‘Believe me, you wouldn’t want to know exactly what I’m thinking right now.’
