AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Lucas was the most confusing, exasperating, arrogant, authoritarian man she’d ever met, she told herself crossly, painfully conscious of every tiny movement from the hard male body at her side.
Since they had started the drive home he hadn’t said more than a word or two, his attention seemingly concentrated on his driving, but the silence was neither quiet or restful—as far as Kim was concerned. In fact the car seemed to vibrate with a throbbing current which was setting Kim’s teeth on edge, as though fingernails were rasping down a slate blackboard.
She was feeling horribly vulnerable for a whole host of reasons: all she had revealed about her past, the fact that she had—despite all her efforts to the contrary—enjoyed being with him, but most of all the knowledge that soon—very soon—he would kiss her again. But she could control the kiss this time, she assured herself vehemently. Of course she could. Whatever Lucas expected, she would make sure it was a polite thank you type of embrace, a brief touching of their lips before she got out of the car and she was not—she was not—going to ask him in for coffee.
With each mile that passed Kim could feel herself getting tenser and tenser, and then they were cruising down her street and the Aston Martin nosed its way across the crossover and into the short pebbled drive in front of the cottage.
She was home. Kim took a deep breath, the courteous little speech she had rehearsed for the last ten minutes hovering on her tongue, and then she found the wind completely taken out of her sails when Lucas said, his tone even and pleasant, ‘That was a great evening, Kim. Thank Maggie again for me, would you, for helping out with Melody?’
‘Yes, yes, I will.’ Was that it? That couldn’t be it, surely?
She watched in something approaching disbelief as Lucas opened his door and walked round the wetly gleaming bonnet, and then her door was open and his hand was helping her to alight.
‘Good night, Kim.’ The brushing of her lips was as brief as ever she had determined earlier, but it was Lucas calling the tune and controlling events.
‘Good night.’
The word was still on her lips when he turned and walked back to the car, opening his door and sliding into the leather interior with a cool smile.
How dared he? After all he had said, how dared he not kiss her? she raged silently. Not that she would have allowed the sort of kiss they had shared earlier, not for a minute, but how dared he not try?
She was still standing there, seething with hurt pride and sheer astonishment, when the car backed out of the drive and on to the road beyond. And then it was gone, in a flash of sleek metal and bright lights, and the damp, chilly night enfolded her in its shadowy darkness.
Why hadn’t he kissed her? She touched her mouth with a bemused hand. Really kissed her? She glanced up into the night sky but the dense thick rainclouds held no answers. Didn’t he like her any more? Perhaps he had been bored tonight, the way she’d wished earlier; they said you should be careful what you wished for.
Of course, it was all to the good. She drew in a lungful of cold air that smelt of wet earth and vegetation, and bit her lip against the urge to cry. It really was. This way she was saved the embarrassing necessity of having to rebuff his advances, to fight him off.
Fight him off! She smiled bitterly. He hadn’t been able to get away quickly enough. Well, that was the end of that. She nodded to the thought and then said it out loud, her breath a white cloud in the cold air. And she was glad. She was really, really glad. She only felt this sick churning in her stomach because of the rich food, that was all.
She stood for a few moments more until she became aware her coat was enshrouded with tiny droplets from the misty rain and turned abruptly, squaring her shoulders as she walked over to the front door and searched her small handbag for her key.
It would be work tomorrow as usual.
CHAPTER SEVEN
KIM spent a wretched night tossing and turning and finally gave up all hope of sleep at four in the morning, padding quietly down to the kitchen and making herself a steaming cup of hot chocolate.
She drank it curled up in one of the armchairs with just the dim light from a table lamp lighting the sitting room, and the dying glow from the embers of the fire providing a little warmth.
She didn’t want to feel like this. It was a silent wail but none the less anguished for it. She didn’t want to let any man under her skin ever again. But somehow…somehow Lucas had managed to turn her world upside down in the five months in which she’d worked for him. She had been fighting this strange attraction, this almost consuming fascination from day one, if she was being truthful.
She should never have accepted the post as secretary to Lucas, it had been foolhardy—madness. But then she wouldn’t have had this lovely home, had a chance to clear her debts once and for all and to take charge of her life, and Melody’s, again, would she? she argued back.
And she could get a handle on this; it just needed discipline, and of course it would be a whole lot easier now if he had decided she wasn’t worth the effort.
The thought hit her hard in the chest and she bowed her head over the mug, her eyes desolate. She was going crazy, here, she told herself miserably. She had to pull herself together. She would never contemplate exposing herself and Melody to the risk of another disastrous relationship, she knew that deep inside, so whether Lucas wanted her or not was immaterial.
After another cup of chocolate Kim decided she had moped enough. She set her face resolutely, pulled out the ironing board and tackled the pile of ironing she had been trying to ignore for days. That finished, she fetched out her baking tins and set about making one of the rich chocolate cakes Melody loved so much, followed by a cheese and bacon flan for their tea later that day.
It was light outside by the time she had finished, and after clearing up the kitchen she ran herself a hot bath and luxuriated in the warm bubbles for over half an hour, relishing that she had plenty of time for once.
After washing her hair and applying a rich conditioner she let it dry naturally whilst she creamed every inch of her skin, pampering herself in a way she hadn’t done for ages.
She wanted to look her absolute best today. She didn’t question why it was so important, it just was.
Once in her cream and pine bedroom, Kim contemplated the contents of her wardrobe thoughtfully. She needed to radiate cool control and efficiency. Never mind she didn’t feel it, she told herself bracingly, half the population got through on a wing and a prayer at some point in their lives, and this was her point. She was not going to creep into the office this morning like a small whipped puppy—she was going to be the dignified, mature, capable woman she really was. Simple.
By the time every item of clothing was strewn over the bed, Kim was panicking. It was time to get Melody up for school and normally by now she was dressed, perfectly groomed and had prepared their breakfast.
