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I kiss his shoulder and squeeze him. My eyes are finally beginning to feel heavy. Ben fell asleep an hour or so ago, holding me tight to him. I’ve never had anyone do that before. It feels nice… like I matter.
“I know you’re asleep, Ben. I probably wouldn’t tell you if you were awake, I wouldn’t have the nerve. But, tonight is one of the best nights of my life. Thank you for being you.” I whisper all of that against his ear. I do it slowly, and as quiet as possible, because I really don’t want to wake him. It’s just my heart feels so full right now.
“Luna,” he whispers and I blink. Surely, I misunderstood him.
“Ben,” I question, though my voice is barely more than a breath—a painful, frozen breath that I have to force out of my lungs.
“Luna, kiss me,” Ben says, his head burrowing against the side of my neck, his nose brushing against my flesh.
I think back over our conversations.
Recently suffered a bad break up. She ditched me for another man.
I could be jumping to conclusions, but when I think about it, it all clicks into place. Including the way my brother and Ben seem to dislike each other without a real reason.
Then, the final piece in the puzzle clicks into place with a giant smacking noise echoing in my brain. Earlier today, Gavin told me that him and Luna are officially engaged now. When I told him to put Luna on the phone so I could congratulate her, he told me she was gone because she wanted to tell her ex before he found out about it from other people. Gavin wasn’t happy about it, but let her go, because Luna wasn’t going to let him convince her she shouldn’t.
Suddenly Ben’s entire attitude makes a lot more sense. Especially when I remember how he asked me who I was going to kick him aside for. Pain rips through me, unlike any I’ve felt before, because this pain comes with so much anger it’s physically hard to contain.
I don’t think, I just react. I get up and walk into the bathroom. After Ben and I cleaned up earlier I put his shirt back on. I rip it off over my head and throw it on the floor, finding my old clothes that I wore from work tonight. I put them on quickly and just before I’m about to leave I notice a large bowl on the sink counter. I grab it and put it under the bath faucet. It’s taking too long to fill, so I end up shutting it off when the bowl gets one-half full of cold water.
I flip the bedroom light on and then carry the water over to the bed, looking down at an unsuspecting Ben—the asshole. Then, I just turn it upside down, drenching him.
“What the fuck!” he growls, jumping up in the bed, looking around trying to figure out what just happened. His eyes light on me and confusion is clear to read, despite the water streaming down his face, as he pushes his hair away.
“Junie? What in the hell is going on?”
“It’s good you know my name. I guess you just have to be awake!”
“What are you talking about? Junie, this isn’t funny. Did you forget your fucking meds today or something? Jesus, why am I always getting messed up with women who have fucking issues?”
“You mean like, Luna?” I growl and that’s when Ben goes still, there’s a light going off in his head, I’d bet money on it.
“Junie…”
“The girl who dumped you for another man, Ben. Was it, Luna?”
I don’t know what I expected from him. Maybe I hoped he’d deny it.
He doesn’t.
“Yeah, Junie. It was Luna.”
“You love her,” I whisper, feeling something that had just sparked into life die inside of me.
“Yeah, maybe… or maybe not. Hell, Junie, I don’t even know anymore. It’s confusing,” he says with a brutal honesty that probably wasn’t meant to hurt me, but does all the same.
“I tell you what’s not confusing, Sheriff.”
“Junie—”
I keep talking over his pathetic attempt to backpedal. “The fact that you called me her name in your sleep.”
“Damn it, Junie, just let me think here.”
“And you did that within an hour of me getting you off.”
“Junie—”
“No, not Junie. Only people who are important in my life call me Junie, Sheriff. That’s definitely not you. Not now,” I tell him and then I walk away.
Ben doesn’t even try to stop me, which just goes to show what an idiot I truly am, because I spend the entire time wishing he would…
