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Adam closes the gap between us, pulling off my shirt and throwing it to the floor. He grabs his own, tugs it over his head and wraps his arms around my waist, needing the feel of our skin rubbing together. The heat, the softness of my body against the hard planes of his.

“Jesus…” He takes my mouth in another passionate kiss. We break apart only long enough to shed the rest of our clothes and fall onto the bed. “I need you, El. I…”

“I know, Adam.” And I do know. I feel it too. I need the closeness of him physically, the connection of him moving inside me.

Adam’s lips follow the lines of my body, his light stubble scraping against my sensitive skin as he trails wet kisses over my breasts and stomach until he reaches the apex of my thighs. His tongue swipes over the delicate folds and the breath is sucked from my lungs.

“Adam…” My back arches and I fist the sheets, needing something to ground me as his touch sends me flying. He takes his time, exploring every part of me, bringing me to the brink of something impossibly perfect. “Oh God, oh God…” My voice is stolen when Adam’s tongue flicks over that sizzling spot one last time and I fall, brilliant white sparks flashing behind my eyes.

Panting, I open my eyes to see Adam kneeling on the bed, quickly rolling a condom on his hard length. His eyes meet mine and I shudder. He always looks at me as if I’m the sexiest woman on earth, like he wants to devour me and fill me up until we’re both sweaty and sated.

“El…” My whispered name is reverent, the love he has clear in just that one word.

Adam lays over me, brushing his mouth over mine, skimming his tongue over my lips, and enters me with one desperate thrust.

“God El.” His head drops to my shoulder as he chokes on his words. “I love you so much.”

My fingers caress his neck, finding their way into his hair. I tug on it to bring his mouth back to mine so I can whisper against his lips. “I love you, Adam.”

The kisses become insistent and we move, our sweat-slicked bodies finding the perfect rhythm. Our moans become louder, the words we say turn into unintelligible mumbling, and then… bliss. Electricity hums across my skin, every nerve ending exploding with pleasure. It builds up in my core and unleashes in a burst of ecstasy, my body thrashing and writhing as Adam thrusts to his own completion.

We lay tangled up in the sheets, my head on his chest so I can listen to the steady beating of his heart. Adam strokes my hair, pulling his fingers through it and sending shivers across my neck.

He presses a kiss to the top of my head. “It will all work out, Sweetheart.”

I want so badly to believe him, to have something I haven’t had in a long time. Hope. A future. A life worth living.

17

Adam

The loud bass wakes me from a fitful sleep. I’d never flown before yesterday, or maybe it was today. I can’t be sure, but I did find out that jet lag is a complete bitch. I couldn’t sleep at all on the plane. I was too worried at the thought of leaving Ellie behind, of not being there to make sure she’s safe, that by the time we landed twelve hours later I’d been up for twenty-four hours straight. I check the small digital clock next to the bed, midnight, and someone is in my flat, ready to party.

The past week has been the longest and the shortest one in my life. It seemed as if I didn’t have enough time with Ellie, between studying for her final exams and her mum’s illness, I was relegated to a few spare minutes in between everything. I took what I could get from her, greedy to spend our last days in her bed, wrapped around each other.

“Shut your bloody noise holes!” Dax yells from the bed next to mine, startling me. I whip my head around just in time to see him cover his face with a pillow. Dax can be a bit of a bastard when he doesn’t get enough sleep.

The music gets louder when someone opens the door to our room. “Hey idiots, come out here and meet everyone,” Hawke says. I can tell he’s already had a few drinks from the slight slurring of his words and his crooked grin, plus, he has a half-empty beer in his hand, which he finishes while waiting for our answer.

“We’re fucking tired, shit for brains!” Dax shouts, his voice muffled by his refusal to remove his head from under the pillow.

Hawke laughs and turns to me. “What about you? You coming?” he asks, pointing at me with his empty bottle.

I sigh and drag my hands down my face. There’s no way I’ll get any sleep with all of the noise on the other side of the door. I’ll probably just lie here and think about Ellie. I may as well get up and get my body adjusted to Los Angeles time, even though I feel as though I could sleep for days. “Sure, I’m coming.”

There’s a knock on the front door and the amount of noise in the main area of the flat doubles. I can hear the squealing of girls and the deep voices of guys that greet each other with back slaps and laughs. Great, it hadn’t occurred to me that Gavin and Hawke were the party-hosting type. Guess I should have asked before agreeing to share a flat with them, not that I’m not used to being constantly surrounded by noise. In my old flat, it was every single night, and it usually only ended when someone was silenced with fists.

I get up and leave the bedroom, ready to get used my new life and leave the crappy one behind. Even if I’m only surviving by counting down the days until El joins me here.

* * *

Turns out Hawke’s uncle is pretty good at his job. He got us booked into a bunch of bars around L.A. by playing a digital sampling of our work to different club managers. We’re able to make money playing our gigs, but divided four ways it’s barely enough to co

ver all of the living expenses. Apparently L.A. is just as expensive as London, and way more expensive than a craphole like Hackney.

I can only afford to ring Ellie every few days, the charges are too expensive for more. I glance at the clock for the millionth time today, knowing I’ll be speaking to El in a few more hours.

“Chill out Adam. You keep looking at that clock and I’m gonna knock your teeth out,” Dax growls. “Pay attention to rehearsal or we’re gonna look like a bunch of duffers on Saturday.”

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