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“There’s a catch though Helen.”
“Oh?” I was innocently assuming something like extra hours or maybe a penalty to my salary.
“You have to be in a serious relationship—and I mean engaged, married, serious—within the next three months.”
Reality just dropped away from me. I couldn’t believe it. For a few seconds we just stared at each other.
“I can’t stand to see you so lonely, sweetie.” Lisa’s voice was now soft and encouraging. “I know there’s so much more to you than what you show the world, and I think you deserve someone to share it with.”
“It’s like you’re blackmailing me or something.” I muttered plaintively.
Lisa laughed. “It’s just a deal honey—take it or leave it. You start getting out there and shaking it up, show me a commitment to actually having fun and looking for someone you could really love, and you get your section. Cover anything you want. What do you say?”
I thought about it for a few seconds. Something in me that was bored with being boring rose up and grabbed hold of this idea with a furious passion.
I looked up and met her eyes.
“I’ll take it.”
Two
Roxanne
I’ve been in town only a few days and I wish I could say, it’s been a blast.
Okay. So, the few gigs I’ve been to were okay. There was a pretty mad dance party at a real underground club last night and I ended up driving around in the back of a van with five other girls. We drank too much, ate pizza and tried as hard as we could to make mischief.
It’s been fun, so why am I so bored?
I like to keep my life full of excitement. I’m not one of those girls that has to know exactly when the moneys coming in and how the bills are getting paid. I couldn’t deal with rent and utility bills, let alone dishes and housework.
No way, man. I was built to fly. One night I’ll be washing dishes in the back of some high-class restaurant, the next I’ll be pounding drums in a band playing on the street.
I’m resourceful and creative. Train stations often have shower sections attached to their bathrooms. I’ve charged my phone with the socket of a vending machine. Every now and then, I’ll blow every cent I have on a really fancy hotel room.
The girls I hung out with last night wanted me to cruise with them to the next big gig, but I said no. God knows why, except that I made a bit of money waitressing the last couple of days and I want to explore this city a bit more. It can’t all be boring.
I’m frustrated with myself. None of what is going down here is dull. I rode in here on a bus with five bucks in my pocket and only the clothes on my back. All I had in my small backpack was my phone charger and a few things I wouldn’t leave behind, but I travel light.
I got put on the bus by my ex, a crazy girl who I thought would keep me entertained, but all she did was annoy me. She’s an artist and sells most of her work using the ‘crazy talented’ angle. I thought it was cute. Turns out, she actually was crazy.
Told me I was getting in the way of her ‘process’ or something. I didn’t care, I was over it anyway. I made her buy the ticket though. You want to throw me out, you pay for my ride.
Like I give a fuck what anyone thinks. That’s why I live the way I do. No one gets to tell me I’m not good enough.
I don’t envy people their family and friends, far from it. I consider myself blessed to be so free. I don’t have to take anyone’s judgement. I don’t have to change myself at all. If I feel like I’m in a situation like that, I get the fuck out of there.
I’m still wondering why I didn’t leave with the girls. They were fun, nonjudgmental types. I could have stuck with them for a few weeks and gotten into all sorts of adventures. Thing is, I heard somewhere that this town had a decent scene. Not just for the community… But for BDSM.
So far there’s no evidence of this. I’m having to scratch around for scraps of fun when I’m used to swimming in it.
I don’t want to admit it, but I am a bit lonely. Okay, so Karen was nuts. She was cute though. It was the first time I stayed in one place long enough to snuggle on the couch with someone and I kind of liked it.
I’d always been into the more extreme side of things in the bedroom, and Karen loved to play. I have to admit, even though our personalities really didn’t match, it was nice to get kind of comfortable.
I start putting my feet down a little harder as I walk, trying not to scowl. What the fuck am I really looking for? Why am I wandering aimlessly and feeling bad about it for the first time in my life?
I smell the heavenly waft of coffee from a nearby doorway and hurry inside. When in doubt, there’s always coffee. It will distract me for awhile until I can figure out what to do tonight. I still don’t even know where I’m going to spend the night and I can’t really afford a hotel.
