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“That’s about what I figured from when I met him three years ago. Like he was a big fish in a small pond. Handsome but he knows it and has the ego to go with it.”
“Are you saying Noah thinks he’s hot shit?” she laughed.
“I wouldn’t use those exact words, but yes,” I said.
“Then you figured him out pretty quick. But you may have missed the part where he’s a good guy. He had a scholarship, I think for running track, to a state school.”
“What did he study? Business?”
“Nothing. That’s the point of the story. He was only a year into college, maybe a little less, when his dad had the first heart attack. So here he comes back home to right the ship and run the family business.”
“When he was that young?” I said in disbelief. She nodded.
“And he fixes stuff down at the public housing without billing anyone.”
“Are you telling me he’s a good Samaritan?”
“I’m saying there’s more to him than a big ego and a big dick.”
“I don’t want to discuss this at all. It happened after the fire. We haven’t spoken since outside of work. It won’t be happening again. He’s clearly not interested, and I have enough on my plate without trying to juggle a fling on top of everything else. So don’t go expecting wedding receptions or exotic getaways. We’re not even going out for a burger.”
“You sound a little disappointed about that.”
“It’s just the tequila talking right now. I get mopey after two margs. You know me.”
“You usually get loud. I’m not used to seeing you mopey.”
“Really?” I said, then shrugged. “I guess it’s new then.”
“You really like him, don’t you?” she asked.
I nodded. There was no sense in pretending I didn’t like him. Even when he irritated me. Even when I felt a tug of hollowness and sadness when I thought of the night we spent together. I respected his work ethic, his commitment to producing quality constructions and the fact the was working for no profit because the project meant as much to him as it did to me. Adding in the coming home from college because his dad was sick thing, and, voila, the man had a tragic backstory to add to the already mounting reasons he had gotten under my skin. If I managed not to sigh or pout, it was nothing but sheer luck. Because it was obvious from the fact I’d slept with him to begin with that self-control wasn’t my strong suit at this stage in my life. I’d fall for a man who showed me a good time one night.
He’d held me in his lap and just taken his sweet old time seducing me. There was definitely something to be said for a hard-headed Southern man who knew he had a pretty face and a fine cock to back it up. He also had every chiseled muscle in between, and the smooth, fine tan of a man who works outdoors with his hands. He was good with those hands, too. I shivered at the memory. I was so screwed.
“What I do or don’t feel doesn’t matter. We have to work together. He wanted a one-night stand. I got my head turned by how good it was, how much more it seemed like.”
“The really good ones can tell you lies without even saying a word,” Michelle said.
I heard the catch in her voice. She wasn’t talking about Noah any longer. She was thinking about Drew, about everything she’d wanted to be true for them. My heart ached for her. No matter how hung up I was on my own problems, there was room in my heart for my best friend and her loneliness. Drew still took up the major real estate in her heart. Even though he broke it. Deep down, I was afraid I’d end up like her. If I didn’t nip my feelings for Noah in the bud right now, I’d wind up pining for him. Comparing other men to him and finding they never measured up. I’d be disappointed again and again by anybody who wasn’t him. It didn’t matter how perfect somebody might seem on paper or on a date. It’s who has your heart, even when it’s the worst person possible, the one it could never work out with.
That’s what Noah was for me. It could never be him. He was hot sex and that slow burn voice that sounded rough around the edges in the dark. That wasn’t real life, not the day-to-day pressures of how I wouldn’t be home for dinner because of a meeting or that he forgot to change any of the light bulbs at the house because he was building stuff for other people. We’d argue and make each other miserable, because at some point the banter and bickering would become resentful, not just foreplay. The stubbornness on both sides, the clash of personalities and the fact that we were two very busy people with demanding jobs and not enough personal time would destroy anything we tried to have together long-term.
