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She scoffs. “I suppose I can’t blame you.” Her voice is strained and low. “After all, it’s not like you had the best role model when it came to how to treat a woman.”
I can’t believe she’s gone there. Of all the hurtful things to say to me—
“My mom was right about you all along,” she says, with an empty laugh that hits me square in the chest. “The apple really doesn’t—”
“Don’t.” My jaw is clenched, my fists balled at my sides.
If there’s one thing on this planet I can’t stand, it’s being compared to my father. Not when I’ve worked so hard to be the total opposite of him. And now, as I’ve just learned, the thing I can’t stand even more is that Emily thinks I’m like him.
“Don’t what, Peter? Don’t say things that are true, because you’re all about the lies we tell?”
“I’m nothing like my father, and you know that. So don’t do that. You want to argue with me, fine. Let’s have at it. But don’t do that.”
She drops her eyes, and even though she doesn’t say anything, I know I’ve gotten through to her. Arguments are fine to have, but when they spiral into hurt and destruction, that’s when your real problems begin. I’ve seen it happen enough times in my father’s relationships to know that for a fact.
“I was doing it for you,” I say then. “How can you not see that? I knew that if I filled you in on just how badly the investigation was going, that you’d—”
“Well, I’m not some precious little thing that’s made of glass, Peter. I won’t break at the slightest obstacle. And you sure as hell don’t get to choose what I can and can’t handle,” she says, her chest heaving from the way her breath is coming, ragged and fast.
And then it hits me like a pile of bricks. She’s right.
Even though my intentions were good, I had no right to keep details about the case from her. By negating her own control over her life, I basically acted exactly like my father.
“I’m sorry, Emily,” I say, with all the sincerity I can muster. I hold out my hands to her. “I didn’t see it at the time, but I get it now. Keeping you in the dark wasn’t the best way to protect you.”
Her shoulders slump, telling me the fight has gone out of her, too. I approach her slowly with my arms still outstretched.
“It won’t happen again,” I say, as I come up in front of her.
She doesn’t pull away.
Instead, Emily steps into me, allowing me to wrap my arms around her as she buries her head in my chest.
“I hate fighting with you,” she says, her voice trembling. “Of all people, not you.”
“Okay, new rule,” I say, kissing the top of her head. “No more lies, no matter what.”
Her head bobs against my chest as she nods. “Deal.”
I gently stroke her head, relishing the relief of having her in my arms like this. I didn’t think it was possible before, but it feels as though we’re even closer than we were a few hours ago. Our connection even deeper. I don’t understand it, but I’m not interested in analyzing the thing to death. It is what it is, and it’s fucking amazing.
Amazing and incredible, how this person has managed to upend my life in a matter of days, to the point that I’m standing in a hotel room, thinking about how I never want to let her go.
Chapter Thirteen
Emily
I wake up,
and the room is plunged in darkness. Peter’s steady breathing is the only sound at all. I roll over and look at him.
He’s lying with his back to me, his shoulder rising and falling with every breath. The rhythm of it is so hypnotic, after watching him for a moment my eyes begin to droop. But I don’t want to go back to sleep just yet.
I move closer to him, shaping my body around his form, with my one arm over his waist. I press against him, loving the way our bodies fit together, the way they seemingly become one. His breathing guiding mine, his heartbeat in my own chest.
“Peter?” I place the softest kiss on his spine, lingering there just a little longer than I should.
He inhales deeply, and then quietly moans the breath back out. But he says nothing. I know he’s just as exhausted as I am, and that I should probably let him sleep. But my own sleep is broken because of something terrible, and I know I won’t find peace until I fix it.
