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"I know where that is. What time do you want to meet?"
I checked my watch and saw that it was six-fifteen. "Is six forty-five okay? I know it's only half an hour from now but..."
"It's fine," Claudia replied, although she sounded guarded. I wondered if she thought I was going to start a cat fight with her over Simon. God, I hoped so. I would be ecstatic if that was my biggest problem.
"Great. I really appreciate you meeting up with me. See you soon."
Claudia hung up without replying and I grabbed the coat I had just slipped off and thrown on my bed, pulling it back on. I grabbed my backpack, thinking I'd use the library as an excuse as to why I was leaving the apartment.
"I'm heading out to the library to work on my assignment," I said, passing Sarah laying on the couch. Sarah nodded without much enthusiasm. I paused before opening the front door. "Will you be okay?"
Sarah gave a heavy sigh. "It just sucks that I'm in the dumps over a relationship that didn't even exist." She looked over at me standing by the door. "I'm going to head over to the East End later with Jenny."
I raised an eyebrow and Sarah gave a snort. "I know what you're thinking. And it's not to see Grant." I didn't say a word but looked at her in disbelief. "Seriously, I'm not going because I want see Grant. The East End is our bar. I'm not going to stop going there just because Grant's playing there. And Simon and Marcus are still my friends. I'm not going to let this crap with Grant affect that."
"I'm sorry, you're right. You deserve to hang out at the East End just as much as Grant. And it won't hurt to see him miserable either."
Sarah smiled, but her eyes still looked sad. "Too bad Grant
couldn't figure out that he would be miserable without me before it was too late." She shook her head, as if to clear out the funk she was in. "Anyways, try not to have too much fun at the library. And come out if you get finished at a decent hour. I'll probably still be there even at an indecent hour, so head on over either way."
"Maybe," I replied, but I knew there was no way I was going to the East End tonight.
The walk to campus was blustery and cold and I tightened the collar of my coat closer around my neck. It was already dark and despite the numerous lights on campus for safety, it didn't dispel the gloom of the night.
When I reached the steps of Downing Hall, I still had fifteen minutes to spare since it was a quick walk from our apartment. I sat down on the steps and surveyed the campus. There were a few students hurrying across campus, but it was relatively quiet. Most students were at home now or at the bars, mourning the end of the weekend and dreading the coming Monday. I wished there were more people around, although that was a false safety. What could they do to help me against a vardoger? They'd just look at me like I was crazy if I told them a shadow was after me.
I saw a figure hurrying towards me and recognized Claudia's short blonde hair. She was smiling as she approached me and I stood, watching her. She looked completely normal.
"Caitlin!" she called out. She stopped just short of me, her breath coming out in misty puffs in the cold air. "It's freezing! It probably wasn't a good idea to meet outside. How long have you been waiting? You must be so cold!"
I realized I didn't even feel the cold. Fear seemed to be a good way to keep warm.
"Hi Claudia," I said, trying to look into her eyes but she chose that exact moment to sweep her bangs away from her face, obscuring her eyes. "Thanks for coming. I know it was kind of weird to ask you to meet me out of the blue."
Claudia shrugged lightly. "I figured it must be something important."
I nodded. "Claudia," I started, staring at her eyes. I felt hope bloom inside of me when I saw her clear grey eyes looking back at me expectantly. Her pupils didn't dilate, obscuring her irises. Aunt Brenda had been wrong. Claudia hadn't been overtaken by her vardoger yet. "Claudia," I said again, this time urgently. "What I'm going to tell you is going to sound crazy. But please, just listen to me until I finish. You can tell me I'm crazy afterwards."
Claudia nodded warily, looking worried. I rushed on, not wanting to lose my nerve. "I've always had these...visions. Nightmares, you could call them. They were horrific. Of people dying. The people were strangers, except they weren't. After I had dreams of them dying, I would meet them in real life. Like my dreams were predicting the people I would meet."
I drew in a deep breath, and Claudia continued to just look at me, although I saw concern on her face. "Except they weren't just dreams. I can't explain everything now, but there are these things...these shadows called vardogers. They're a part of you but not a part of you. They look just like you, but aren't you." I made a sound of frustration, realizing I wasn't making sense. My urgency to try and make Claudia understand was making me practically incoherent. I forced myself to focus.
"I'll just call them shadows," I started again, trying to sound reasonable. "Everyone has a shadow. They used to be harmless, but some shadows started wanting to kill their person to take over their body. To no longer be a shadow. And my dreams predict whose shadows will try and kill them. And I've had a vision...a dream, of your shadow trying to kill you."
Claudia looked alarmed and she took an instinctive step back. "Uh, Caitlin...you're scaring me. Are you sure you haven't been watching too many episodes of the Twilight Zone?"
"I know it sounds crazy. It sounded crazy to me too. But it's true. I wish to God it wasn't, but it is." I paused, trying to figure out how to make Claudia believe me. "Have you ever had moments where you didn't feel like yourself. A second where you felt like you didn't have control of your body? Or maybe you couldn't remember what happened a few seconds ago, like you weren't present?"
Claudia bit her lip and I could see a glimmer of recognition at my description and I grabbed onto it.
"I can see that you have! Claudia, just consider the possibility that it's true. That I'm trying to save your life. Please."
Claudia took a deep breath, seeming to consider my words. "I can't deny that there's some truth to those...feelings you described. But to say I have a shadow that's trying to kill me? I don't know." She shook her head and then shivered. "Can we talk about this somewhere else? Somewhere indoors? I'm freezing."
I sighed in relief. It didn't seem like Claudia was dismissing the idea completely so I still had a chance. I wondered if her vardoger was listening, angered by everything I was telling her. There was still so much I didn't know about all of this. Every time I thought I understood, another question, another uncertainty popped up. I just had to take the chance.
"Why don't we go to the student center? We can talk in the lounge." The Maxwell student center was only a few buildings away, and the lounge would be relatively quiet on a Sunday night.
