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Suddenly, I heard a hiss as if someone was expelling air through closed teeth. What made me scream was that the hiss sounded like it was coming from right behind me, as if the person responsible for the hiss was breathing down my neck.
I whipped around, my heart pounding in my ears. Nothing. There was nothing but an empty sidewalk behind me. My breathing felt more and more strained as I began feeling lightheaded. I dazedly wondered if this was the beginning of a panic attack. I had never had one before, but the feeling of anxiety and fear overtaking me felt debilitating.
"Hello?" I called out, my voice sounding feeble in the night air. "Is anyone out there?" I felt stupid calling out, not expecting anyone to answer me. It was more that I needed to hear my own voice to confirm that I was lucid and functioning.
After pausing a few seconds and only hearing the whipping wind as my reply, I turned and started making progress again, although my walking was more akin to a light jog.
"Caitlin, get a hold of yourself," I muttered. "You can't go crazy yet. You still have to get through one and a half semesters."
I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself, when I suddenly felt a cold hand on my shoulder, gripping tight. Dread was emanating from the hand, snaking into every part of my body. The feeling didn't even make sense to me, but my body kicked into survival mode. I had no desire to turn around and see whether there was someone real behind me or if this was a figment of my imagination. Self-preservation took control and I started running. The hand was ripped from my shoulder as I ran as fast as I could, too terrified to scream. Nothing could be sacrificed from my burning desire to save myself by running as fast as I could - certainly not a scream that no one would hear.
I didn't stop until I reached Colette's, ripping open the door and flinging myself in. As the warmth and familiarity of the cafe enveloped me, I bent over and dropped my hands to my knees, panting as I struggled to draw in deep breaths. The adrenaline was leaving my body and I was left with heaving gasps of air as I tried to catch my breath, the frantic running having taken its toll. Sarah was the runner, not me. The few times she had been able to convince me to go running with her, I had ended up walking most of the way when my lungs had protested from being overused.
"You okay?" Colleen asked with a raised eyebrow. She was standing behind the register and looking at me in a way that made me feel foolish. I realized that all eyes in the cafe were on me. I must have made a spectacle of myself, running into Colette's as if demons were chasing me. The thought made my heart clutch in fear and I shook my head, forcing myself to ground myself in reality.
"Sorry," I said with a wry look as I caught my breath. "I thought I was going to be late for my shift and ran all the way here from class. Not a great idea, I guess, considering the only time I run is when I see a spider."
Colleen glanced at the clock on the wall and looked back at me as if I had two heads. "You're twenty minutes early."
I tried to laugh as I walked past the counter. "You know I'm a stickler for punctuality."
I walked to the back room where employees stashed their belongings before Colleen could make another comment. I took my work shirt out of my backpack and quickly changed into it, stowing my bag underneath a chair.
I was working with Marnie, and for once her constant chatter was welcome. It made it hard to think about anything else as I tried to keep up with her quickly changing topics. They ranged from the boy in her class that had asked her out, to her sandwich at lunch that had tasted funny. Marnie was also beside herself with excitement over coming to our party tomorrow night. I was able to fill my head with her lightning fast topic changes so that there was room for nothing else.
I went home that night exhausted, a combination of the fatigue of adrenaline, the lack of sleep from the night before and being on my feet at Colette's. I was able to convince myself I had imagined being grabbed from behind earlier because of exhaustion. I had no other explanation for it. At least, no explanation I was willing to accept.
Sarah and the rest of the group were hanging out at the East End tonight and she had texted for me to join them, but I had begged off due to exhaustion, wanting to go straight to bed. I prayed that I would have a dreamless sleep, but she was waiting for me the moment I closed my eyes. Demanding that I witness her death yet again.
**********
I watched the morning come in from the living room couch as an infomercial about a gadget for people who loved boiled eggs but hated peeling them hummed in the background. I heard Sarah's door open and she padded out into the living room, frowning when she saw me already there.
"Another vision?" she asked softly, compassion etched on her face.
I shrugged and made an attempt at a smile. "Either that, or I desperately want to know how to enjoy a dozen hard boiled eggs without having to peel even one."
Sarah sat down next to me with a sigh. "Considering you don't even like hard boiled eggs, I'll say it was another vision."
I gave her an exaggerated look of censure. "I'll have you know that I've enjoyed plenty of deviled eggs in my time."
Sarah rolled her eyes but smiled. "No jokes." She took on a serious expression. "Do you want to talk about it? Maybe it'll make you feel better."
I sighed, debating how much to tell Sarah. Even though I confided in Sarah more than anyone else, I had only described a few visions to her and not on a detailed level. Describing the visions out loud made me fear that they would actually happen, even if that fear was irrational.
"There was a girl in my vision being attacked and beaten to death with a piece of plywood."
Sarah shuddered, looking horrified. "Oh God, that's horrible. Who was beating her?"
"I don't know. I never see the attacker in my visions when it's a murder. Not their face anyways. Just the victims."
"Have you met the girl in your vision yet?"
I shook my head. "No. I'm hoping that I won't but if my past is any predictor, it's inevitable that I will. A part of me is dreading it but another part of me just wants to get it over with so I don't keep tensing every time I see a blonde with short hair."
"So the girl is blonde?" Sarah asked.
"Yeah. Pretty soon, every blonde on campus is going to think I'm a freak by the way I look at them."
