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“Then, he snatches that hope away from you. It’s a sense of security he knows you want, but he’s not willing to give it to you. So, why keep falling for the same magic trick when you already know how it ends?”
“I don’t know, Alise. It’s complicated.”
“I know it is, but you have to figure it out. This is your heart and your life. You are responsible for your own happiness, not Ned, and not anybody else.”
“I guess I just love him on a soul level. Not in the physical sense, but him, the person. I can’t get over the way I love him. I just can’t,” she said, and I felt that coming from the bottom of her soul. My best friend was helplessly in love with a dog.
“Well, I used to love Lamont like he was cooked food,” I interjected. “I really did love him. But when I finally realized that it didn’t matter what I did, he wasn’t going to support my dreams, and that he wasn’t there for me like I was there for him, I had to make one of the hardest choices of my life and let him go. I chose me.”
“And you’re so strong for that. If I could just bottle a little of that shit up, I would dump Ned out of my life and expose him for the lying cheat that he is. When he’s not around me, I feel strong and vibrant, but as soon as I see his face, I bitch up and fall right back in line with the game he’s running. He has some type of power over me that makes me crave the little bit that he gives me, even though I know after he gets what he wants, he’s going to go back home.”
“To her. There, I said it for you. Don’t you ever forget to add that part. He’s going back home to her, Jayne, so you might as well start saying it out loud so much that you can hear the words in your sleep. Ned has a wife that he married while you were together, and he left your bed to go home to her last night.”
The loud silence that overtook the line let me know that reality stung Jayne deeply. A faint whimper interrupted the silence, and my face tightened. I started to feel as if I would cry right along with her. Some men just didn’t care to understand the devastation they left behind after their midnight trysts.
“You don’t have to be so harsh, Alise. I’m hurting over here. You think I feel good interfering with a marriage? But what about me? He was mine first! I still have my engagement ring. He was supposed to marry me, not her. Why does she get protected by the shield of a marriage certificate, when she knew that he was mine before she married him?”
The hurt in Jayne’s voice shattered her usual hard exterior. She was irrevocably burned by Ned. If I had it my way, I would burn his ass back, literally. Even if she picked up the pieces and moved forward and never looked back, these types of blows in love forever changed a person’s DNA.
“Sis, the way you feel about him and his marriage is valid. You had no idea he had another woman, and he betrayed you in the worst way imaginable. The only thing I’m saying to you is for you to stop being a willing participant in his betrayal. Every time you allow him back in, it’s like you’re saying what he did to you is okay. It’s not.”
With that, Jayne broke down into a full-on bawling session, and I was right there for her. I knew what was coming after the tears were wiped away. She would proclaim that she wasn’t going to deal with him anymore, that it was over once and for all. I had heard the proclamations so many times that I could recite them on demand.
You know what, Alise, I’m done. You’re right, I deserve better than this. This is the last time he’s going to come over here and treat me like shit. The next time Ned comes to my door, I’m going to cut his ass from his chest to his little penis and send him back to her in pieces.
And so, she began, “You know what, Alise, I’m done… You’re right, I deserve better…”
I waited for her to finish her usual declaration and readied myself to be on alert for the next time she needed me to build her back up, to help her get back to Jayne. With Ned’s manipulative ass, there would always be a next time.
“On to another subject,” I began, confident that Jayn
e was feeling better. “Do you have everything you need for the wedding? It’s coming up soon.”
“Yes, I picked up my shoes yesterday, and I’ve set all of my appointments for my hair, nails, and waxes. How about you?”
“Still waiting on those dang-on gold shoes to come in, but after that, I’m good to go with hair, nails, everything,” I replied.
“Good. Well, I’ll see you Saturday night at the club. I’m going to share the “Love Me Again” cover again today, too. That song is holding its spot on the charts. Hopefully, it will start climbing today,” Jayne said.
I smiled because she was my biggest supporter. My friends, Tameka and Kemara, were second and third in line for my biggest fans.
“Thanks, and Jayne?”
“Yes.”
“You are so very beautiful, my friend. Too beautiful to be a little dick man’s side piece,” I said bluntly, but she chuckled.
“I know, and you are right.”
“So, what are we going to do to make this right?”
“I’m going to get my head in the game.”
“That’s my girl.”
“Okay, sis. I got this!”
I hung up and sighed, praying my best friend would get a grip on her situation with Ned. She deserved a man worthy of her high-sprung fun energy, and Ned was nothing but an energy drainer, and he found a good energy source in Jayne. She needed to disconnect him from her life and find someone who could handle her outlandish spunk but also cherish the hell out of her flaws.
