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Squeezing the taut back of his neck, Logan stared down at his deceptively innocent-looking pet. “Have you lost your mind?”
Ninja yawned, then walked over to rub his head affectionately against Alexis’s leg.
“Look, I’m sorry you had to go to this much trouble so late. You should have called Bonnie and had her send me to get him.” Logan shook his head when Ninja strolled back to nuzzle his hand. “You’re lucky she didn’t call the dog collector,” he said, though both he and Ninja knew Alexis would never do such a thing.
“It wasn’t that much trouble.”
He pushed his hands into his pockets and drew a deep breath. At almost the same time as Alexis, he blurted, “I was going to call you tomorrow.”
“You were?” she asked, even as he said, “Wait. You were going to call me?”
He shook his head. “You go first.”
He saw her moisten her lips. “I panicked.”
“I know.”
His blunt response took her aback for a moment, but then she surged on. “We had such a perfect time in Seattle. And your sisters are happy newlyweds and you’re surrounded by weddings and honeymooners all the time. I was afraid you were suddenly seeing me through, you know, sort of a romantic haze. I guess you know, in my experience, that sort of emotion doesn’t last. I’ve seen it over and over again, couples who fall madly in love—or lust—who declare each other perfect, and then later they can’t even stand to look at each other. I can’t live up to an idealistic image you might have formed of me. And when the magic wears off—”
He heard her swallow before she finished, “I suddenly realized how much you could hurt me. How much I’ve come to care for you. And...I panicked.”
This night had become one disconcerting shock after another. “Let me get this straight. You decided I was being too romantic? Me?”
She had the grace to look sheepish. “Not in the typical, poetic sort of way, of course. That’s not your style. But, well, all of a sudden you wanted to make our relationship public. And you...well, you hinted that maybe our relationship could lead to...you know.”
She couldn’t even say the word.
He could. “Marriage.”
“Yes,” she whispered, turning her face so that shadows fell across her features.
* * *
For a moment the only sound in the night-shrouded gardens was the whisper of a breeze through new spring leaves, the splash of water from the fountain, Ninja’s happy panting by Logan’s side. No one moved around them; the guests were closed inside the cozy inn, the lights glowing in the bedroom windows the only sign that anyone else was near. Alexis blocked out even those indications, keeping her attention focused solely on this momentous conversation with Logan. As far as she was concerned, they could have been the only two people around for miles.
Logan kept his voice low. “I don’t idealize you, Alexis. Frankly, there are times when you’re as much of a pain in the butt as my sisters.”
She couldn’t bring herself to smile. Her lower lip was caught between her teeth as she listened to him with her hands locked in front of her.
“I know you have flaws,” he said, “but you should know I’m bored by perfection. And by those who pretend to be. I wouldn’t change one thing about you.”
He shoved his hands into his pockets, adding gruffly, “I know I’m no prize, myself. I’m grouchy and stubborn and inflexible—and those are just the things my loving sisters say about me. I’ve got scars—inside and out. And those scars put a lot of people off.”
She was sincerely appalled when she released her lip to say with a slight gasp, “Surely you don’t think your scars make you any less attractive to me?”
“You wouldn’t be the first to back away because you heard me use the word cancer,” he said grimly. “That’s a word that stays with you for a lifetime. Makes people wonder if you’ll fall victim to it again, no matter what the annual medical exams show.”
She took a step closer to him and looked straight into his eyes, her voice quiet but firm. “Come on, Logan, you know me better than that. I was shocked, of course, when you told me about your experiences. In all the months we’ve been seeing each other, you’d never mentioned it before and I had no idea. I’d like to hear more about it, because it’s a part of who you are. I want to hear how you felt when you heard the diagnosis, what it was like to go through the treatments, how it affects you now. But the fact that you’re a cancer survivor had nothing at all to do with my reluctance to get more deeply involved with you.”
He blew out a breath.
“I can answer those questions in just a few words. It sucked, treatment was hell and there’s no reason to believe I’ll ever have to go through it again, so it doesn’t affect me at all now. We can talk more about it if you want to, but it’s not something I dwell on. Much. My scars are all hidden by my jeans, and my limp isn’t very noticeable, so the subject almost never comes up.”
She took another step forward, bringing her to within inches of him. She laid a slightly unsteady hand on his chest, just over his heart, which she could feel beating rather hard against her palm.
“I don’t think your leg was the only part of you left with scars,” she said softly. “My childhood left me with quite a few hidden scars of my own. But I suppose mine are part of who I am today, just as your ordeals have forged you into the man you’ve become. ‘Grouchy and stubborn and inflexible,’” she quoted, repeating the words with a shaky smile. “And I wouldn’t change a thing about you, either.”
He reached up to touch her face, his hand warm and work-roughened but oh so tender against her skin when he slowly removed her glasses. “That first night we were together, after we ran into each other at the coffee shop? It was the best experience of my life to that point,” he murmured. “And it’s only gotten better since. Every single time. You don’t have to worry about the magic wearing off when it comes to the way I respond to you. I can’t imagine ever getting enough of you. And I’m saying this as a cynical, very logical guy who never lets himself get swayed by all the romantic nonsense that goes on around this place.”
