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This was the real Neil Harrison. And he was nothing like the man he was afraid to unleash.
“Carson?” Neil cupped her cheek, his thumb smoothing across her damp skin.
As if all the air had been sucked out of the room, she gasped, unable to catch her breath. She loved him. Holy fucking shit, she loved him.
A shiver ran through her body and he backed away.
“Maybe I shouldn’t—”
She grabbed his chin between her fingers and turned his head to face her. “You didn’t hurt me.”
She grabbed on to the top of the couch, opening herself up, bracing her body for his entry. “Fuck me.”
Neil lined up with her entrance. She nodded, giving him the go ahead and when their bodies were joined he loomed over her and whispered against her ear, “Not this time.”
His eyes locked on hers and with every one of his thrusts they sank deeper, into each other, into this gentle connection. Tears stung her eyes at the tenderness he displayed but then he licked his fingers and placed them at her clit. The extra attention sent the desire dancing in her stomach into overdrive.
“Keep doing that.” She moaned. “Just like that.”
A warm wave washed over her body. She shut her eyes tight and let her orgasm take over.
“That’s it baby. I’m right behind you.”
She faintly heard Neil grunt his own satisfaction behind the fireworks that went off in her ears.
When she finally opened her eyes, Neil was hunched over, his head resting on her breasts, no longer buried deep within her.
Carson released her grip on the couch, letting her arms falls slowly down the rough fabric. She found his head and stroked his hair between her fingers.
Tears stung her eyes as realization set in. This was the last time she was going to be with Neil Harrison. This was the last time she was going to lay with the man she loved. And he would never know she loved him.
It had to be that way. Neil had said only days ago that he didn’t do relationships with women. And she couldn’t keep playing the game that they’d started.
“This is the last time. You know that right?”
He nodded, his head bobbing against her chest.
“We both have too much to lose.” She had already lost her heart. She couldn’t afford to permanently damage her career chasing after a man who was just as driven, just as tied to his job.
He lifted his head and frowned. “You could have called me.”
She tensed. He made it clear they were just sex buddies. They didn’t need to get more involved, more emotionally intimate.
“I know you lost the deal.”
“It’s not totally lost. Not yet. My father made a counter offer and the client is going to get back to us.” She had tried to see her father’s offer as the silver lining. But even after massive amounts of alcohol, the lining was still black.
He lowered his gaze. Why couldn’t he look her in the eye?
He sat back on his heels and stood, practically running into the bathroom.
She snuck into her bedroom and grabbed her robe from behind her door.
Neil was still in the bathroom when her phone chimed. She picked it up from her kitchen counter and slid her finger across the screen.
A new post notification from Toronto Gossip. And she didn’t like the headline.
With the rise of the sex tape, she had subscribed to the blog in order to keep tabs on the information.
