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pulled her up, wasting zero time removing her clothing.
The plunging back of her dress had me tied up in knots all evening. I traced my finger down her soft skin, letting it slip beneath the fabric at the V and tickled the top of her ass cheeks. Her hands did my dirty work and unzipped the side of her dress so I could slip it off. As the fabric fell away, she looked over her shoulder, her eyes catching mine, and for a moment I lost any sense of logic. I didn’t understand how I could be here, in this moment, with this beautiful woman. This woman who had helped me when I needed it the most. Who saw me, despite my vigorous attempts to hide my distrust. Tonight we had no sexual history. We were just Grace and Ben.
That’s all we needed to be.
She wasn’t wearing a bra and it didn’t take much to slide down her scrap of panties. She stepped out of her dress and I directed her to the bed. When she was spread out for my perusal, I kissed my way up her body, pressing my lips to her soft skin until we were face-to-face.
I smashed my lips to hers and she met me with every thrust and stroke of tongue.
“I need this, Ben. Please.” Her plea was a whisper against my mouth.
She regarded me for a moment, her hands palming my cheeks as she looked deep into my eyes. Her stare penetrated right through me, and I feared she saw the worst—my insecurity.
Every time she pleaded I couldn’t help but think about how many times she might have said it before. Because I knew she would have. Grace was a trained professional, and getting her rocks off with me wasn’t something she needed. It was something she wanted. Which should have made me feel good. Prideful. But I was just a penis. I knew she could go out and find a variety of others, probably had since we’d hooked up that night at White Lace. Probably would the moment we went our separate ways.
But Grace was making me feel things, foreign thoughts infiltrating my brain, because for the first time, a part of me wanted to be needed. To be someone’s priority. To be the sun on a rainy day or the warmth in the cold. So despite my intentions to make my mark, I had to do it at a distance. I had to embrace the inevitable—at the first sign of something better, she would leave.
I would do my best to remember that tonight, I was just a means to an end. And there was only one way I was going to survive sex with Grace Nolan. Only one way I could ensure that I kept my distance.
“Turn over. On your stomach.”
She hesitated. She wanted to protest. I saw the defiance in her eyes challenging me, but I knew the moment common sense won out. Her need for sex trumped any emotional attachment she might have been feeling. Her eyes softened and I thanked the universe that she had conceded.
It was one thing to look Grace in the eye under the best of circumstances, but I wouldn’t be able to while I fucked her. I knew that much. I couldn’t risk those nonsensical thoughts somehow coming through in my eyes. Not when I knew that we were running full speed at a brick wall, with no intention of slowing down.
While she settled, I took off my clothes, grabbing a condom from the bathroom and resting it on the bed. I prowled over her, resting both palms on the mattress on either side of her body. She was absolute perfection—smooth, curvy lines and flawless, porcelain skin. As she settled on the mattress, I unwrapped the condom and sheathed my erection.
I shimmied my hand under her pelvis, urging her to lift her bottom so I could slide in. The moment I penetrated her hot, slick entrance, her arms shot up, grabbing the edge of the mattress.
I started out slow, wanting to savor the feeling, commit it to memory just like I had the first time, because I had no idea if after tonight this would ever happen again.
With every upstroke she moaned, her fingers turning white as she tightened her grip on the mattress. I leaned down, pressing my lips to her shoulder, then her neck, kissing my way up until she craned her neck and our lips found each other.
“Harder,” she demanded. “I won’t break.”
I knew that. For some reason, I hadn’t wanted this to be harsh, but the moment she began to tilt and meet my thrusts with a slap of her ass to my pelvis, something inside me broke.
With my right hand holding myself up, I fisted my other in her hair, pulling her head up.
“Yes,” she moaned. “Just like that.”
Every thrust was like a mini orgasm ripped through my body, each one preparing me for the massive explosion that I knew was going to happen within minutes. If she kept squeezing her core like that, maybe seconds.
I watched as she snuck her hand between her stomach and the mattress, lowering her fingers to her clit. Something inside me tightened, and not in the good orgasm way, something in my chest, a pressure like an elephant, had decided to take a load off. It killed me that she had to resort to touching herself in order to get off. I should be concentrating on her pleasure. I should be in control of giving her what she needed. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t risk getting too close. This was the only way I knew how to preserve my heart.
My grip on her hair didn’t let up the entire time I thrust inside her. In fact, it became harder the closer I got to release. With a significant tug to her hair, I heard Grace moan and her body stiffened. I pulled again. This time she cried out, my name falling from her lips as her core fluttered and tightened around my dick as she came.
The tightening of her pussy set me off. My orgasm sparked in my lower back, sending shock waves of pleasure in every direction. My head dropped forward and I inhaled deeply, my mouth finding her neck. I bit down just as my orgasm exploded, my body shuddering on top of hers.
I pulled out slowly, my cock sensitive as I made my way to the bathroom to dispose of the condom.
When I returned, Grace had cuddled up at the top of the bed. Normal etiquette would have me throwing her clothes at her and patting her ass on the way out the door. But I couldn’t do that with Grace. I didn’t want to do that.
So instead, I slipped under the sheet and pulled it over our bodies while I settled against her back. She snuggled into me, her warm, damp skin gliding over mine. And when she sighed in satisfaction, I smiled. Snuggling deeper, closer, letting sleep take me away.
—
I woke up with the sun in my face, streaming in from the floor to ceiling windows. I hadn’t even bothered to pull down the blinds, so it was a good possibility we’d given someone a good show last night.
