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She was completely naked now, and spread out before me. I perused her lush body and when she bit her bottom lip, my cock jerked inside my shorts at her action.
Despite the tense situation, despite knowing that this was the last time, and that both of us were tortured and angry, she was giving me the go-ahead.
And so I took it.
I tugged down my shorts until my cock sprung free, bobbing against my stomach. I wanted nothing more than to flip her over, press her face into the couch cushion, and pretend like the last few weeks hadn’t happened, but I couldn’t, because keeping my distance didn’t matter anymore. It had done me no good. She’d still managed to infiltrate my heart, my soul. Every single molecule that made up my being, she’d made a mark on, and I knew I’d never be able to remove her.
With my cock proud and erect, I still couldn’t close the distance. I didn’t have it in me to make the move.
“You know I can’t give you what you want, Grace.” Her breath was heavy now and she played with her breasts in an attempt to relieve some of her own built-up tension. “I’m no one’s knight in shining armor.”
There wasn’t anything I could do to save her. And a woman like Grace needed a stand-up guy who wouldn’t second guess her motives. Someone who trusted her, and I just couldn’t shake the feeling that everything she said was a lie.
She grabbed my shoulders and pulled me closer, smashing her lips and tongue into my mouth as if pretending she hadn’t heard me. But I couldn’t go on without saying my peace.
“I told you from the beginning, Grace, we were going to crash.”
She pressed her fingers to my cheeks, holding me in place. “Then there’s nothing left to do but burn us to the fucking ground.”
She grabbed my cock and positioned me at her entrance; with one swift movement and a million reasons why I shouldn’t, I pushed forward until I was seated all the way inside.
Her stomach tensed with my entry, her legs pressing out, trying to take me deeper, and when her hands slid down my chest to touch herself, I groaned.
I lowered, resting my arms on either side of her as best I could with the little room on the couch, and started moving. Slow. Steady. Relishing every back and forth. I’d solder the memory to my brain, because the next time I was with Grace it would be in my dreams.
I picked up speed, half wanting this to be over, half never wanting to remove myself from her body. I was torn, ripped into a thousand pieces I knew I’d never be able to put back together.
When I chanced a look at her face, it was my undoing. A single tear fell from her eye, down the side of her face. I turned mine away, pounding inside her. I wanted to reach out. I wanted to console her even though I was hurting just as much as she was. But I didn’t. Instead, I turned my head and concentrated on the cushions of the couch. I heard her whimper and I knew it wasn’t because of an impending orgasm.
I shook my head, righting my thoughts, concentrating on my orgasm, which felt like it was a million miles away.
I wanted this to be rough. I wanted this to be detached. There was nothing between us now but a physical connection. And I wasn’t going to let her forget it.
I pulled out, grabbing her around the hips and turning her over. I spanked her ass just before I thrust back inside. My palms pressed down on her back, keeping her in place. I was unsure if I was hurting her. Unsure of how I was ever going to forgive myself for this, but it was the only way to keep my sanity.
Grace reached out and gripped the edge of the couch, her knuckles white with the strength of her grip, and then she turned her head. And I saw it. She was biting her bottom lip.
She liked it. She liked this. Despite everything going on. The betrayal. The distance between us. She wanted this. And like the asshole I was, it only revved me up again.
She muttered a slew of yes’s under her breath, and from that point on it didn’t take much for me to find my stride. My orgasm crested just as I felt the ripple of her core against my cock, and then it hit me, and with one last thrust I seated myself fully inside her and let my body absorb the wave of pleasure.
I fell forward, my head finding her back as I tried to regulate my breathing. When I finally moved, she scrambled off the couch, picking up her clothes and throwing them back on in a hurry. She didn’t look at me. She didn’t speak. Instead, she grabbed her coat and purse and headed for the door. But with one foot over the threshold she stopped and turned.
My chest seized when I noticed more tears streaming down her cheeks. I had to look away and I let my head fall back against the couch.
This room was my sacred space. This room was where I watched epic romances and tragic losses. This was the place where I watched history unfold and scenes that would stay with me until the day I died. And I had a very bad feeling that, moving forward, the only thought that would stay with me was Grace and the image of her walking out that door, never to return.
When I looked up again, she was gone, and so was my heart.
She’d led me to believe that love was possible, and I had believed it. For a short time, she’d pulled the wool over my eyes.
When in fact it was all a sick joke.
I’d learned a long time ago that even love wasn’t enough to make someone give a shit. In fact, love was the last thing in the world that would make me worthy of being someone’s number one.
Chapter 23
Grace
