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“It’s normal to be worried, but you have more money than Croesus. You have us, and Rodrigo’s family. Things will work out. Even if your kid has issues, you have the resources to get help. You and Loïc were abused by your mother. You won’t do that to your kid, and you’re not going to abandon her like they did to you.”
r /> There wasn’t enough air.
“Fuck. Just get out.”
Church’s gaze was full of love Severin didn’t want right then. “Go shower. At least if you’re clean, you’ll have the option to show up.”
He flipped off Church’s back as he left, then felt like an immature idiot for doing it. His brother was just trying to help, but even taking a shower seemed like he’d made up his mind, and he hadn’t. Not even close.
When the door closed behind his brother’s broad back, Severin fiddled with a few things, then sighed and shut off his equipment before heading for the beach. The day was sunny, but not too hot, and the breeze was pleasant. No one was by his lake, which he appreciated. He hadn’t been there since the drunk sex on the beach, and he was relatively sure he could still make out the vague indentation of Rodrigo’s hands and knees in the sand.
A mental slideshow of that day flipped through his mind. There would be no dwelling on what Loïc did at the lake when he had memories of Rodrigo and Minnow taking up so much more mental space. He remembered taking Minnow swimming here before they were even together. She’d stripped down to her underwear and jumped in with him, and he’d been so confused about what he wanted he’d reverted to being a jerk.
Now he was making her so sad.
He missed them.
They both came to the forge to check on him and drop off food a few times a day, and argue with him about the baby, but those short bursts of company weren’t good enough when he knew they were moving on and making plans without him. Wedding plans. Talking about baby names. They hadn’t stopped living just because he’d taken a step back, and he was jealous of what they were building together. All he had to do was show the fuck up.
He swam and washed the stink off himself, then dressed, not sure what to do next. The surface of the lake wanted to be smooth, but the breeze teased little ripples. A gull wheeled overhead, searching for a meal. Leaves rustled, and he let himself sink into the sound, tension draining for the first time in days. He let his mind empty.
Light footfalls. Minnow?
“There you are.” The child’s voice made his head whip around.
His eldest niece was standing at the edge of the forest, glaring, looking like an irate fairy princess in her white flower girl dress.
“What are you doing here, Sage? You know you’re not allowed down here alone.”
The newly turned seven-year-old planted her hands on her hips. “I’m not alone, asshole. You’re here.”
A laugh burst from Severin’s chest so violently he was pretty sure he’d pulled something. “You know my name isn’t actually asshole, right?”
She shrugged as if it didn’t matter to her either way. “It’s what Daddy usually calls you, so that’s good enough for me. Besides, I get to say bad words when you’re around, and then people give you heck, not me.” She flashed him a grin. The little monster was missing a front tooth. How was she growing up so fast?
“Why are you down here in your nice dress? You’re going to get dirty.”
“My sister is crying because she wants to be your ring bear and you’re making everyone wait. She’s been practicing her growl for weeks. You need to get your ass to the wedding, because what Scarlet wants, I deliver.”
“What if I don’t want to get married?”
She snorted, the sarcasm in the sound an amusing contrast with the fairylike flower girl gown. “Have you looked at who you’re getting married to? A guy like you isn’t going to get a wife and husband like that again.”
“They’d be better off without me.”
“Oh, boohoo. This is Sparta, buddy. Rub some dirt on it and walk it off.”
God, she sounded more like Church every day. It was sort of hilarious.
Severin smothered a laugh. She was funny, but the subject was anything but. “It’s not that easy.”
“It is that easy. You’re the one making things hard.”
He stared at her for a moment, feeling like a weird piece of his puzzle had just slipped into place. The world around him felt surreal – the entire situation was. She was like the ghost of Christmas future, too smart for his own good, making him question everything.
Sage snapped her fingers in front of his face and jabbed a finger at the path she’d just come down. “Move it!”
He rose, not sure why he was obeying a child who was waist high on him.
