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I lay a hand on her shoulder and she shivers.
"Every time you touch me," she begins. "I’ll remember him. Every time I look at you, I’ll know he's the last thing you saw. Every time I say your name, I’ll remember you killed him because of me. You took something precious. You didn't just kill Robin. You killed me too."
"Dove..."
"No." She turns around to face me. "Every time you try to kiss me, I'll resist you. Every time you lay your fingers on me, I'll make myself sick after. And every time you put your cock near me, I'm going to hurt myself. Can you live with that, Nox?"
"I won't fucking let you."
"If you really want to stop me, you'll have to kill me, too."
"Dove, don't be fucking ridiculous," I grunt. "I'm going to take care of you, little bird."
She doesn't say another word. Her gaze wanders off into nothing and she just stares ahead. I touch her. I talk to her. She lets me walk her to the bed. She cries while I kiss her. I can't do this. I fucking can't.
"You don't want me anymore?" I whisper in her ear. She doesn't respond. She just keeps crying.
It's getting light outside and we haven't slept. She looks pale as a ghost and somehow sickly green at the same time.
"Let me fix it," I say. "Let me make it better. Let me make it right."
She doesn't say a word.
"Fuck." I get up. I have to use the bathroom, but I'm nervous about her leaving if I do. I leave the door open and take a piss but she doesn't try to run. She just paces the room.
When I come back though, Dove's holding a pair of scissors like a fucking weapon.
"Don't, Dove," I mutter. "You don't want to hurt yourself again, do you?"
"This is the last time you're going to see me."
"What the fuck?" I growl.
"If I ever see you again, Nox, I'm going to the cops and telling them what you did to Robin."
"Dove, don't." I rush to her. She waves the scissors but I don't let her intimidate me. I don't give a shit if she cuts me. I just want to convince her to stay. "I'll make it right. I'll do everything. Anything."
She just keeps shaking her head, her hand trembling. The scissors clatter to the floor. I don't try to move closer.
"I need to leave," she whispers. "I mean it, Nox. I can't forgive you. I'll never forgive you. If I see you again, you will pay."
"Dove, let me change your mind."
"No!" she roars this time. "No, you've taken fucking enough from me. I'm done letting you steal my life. My people. I'm done with you. Done."
"But Dove, I..." I bite my lower lip. Fuck. Can I even fucking say it? Will it make a difference now? I've known it for a long time. "Dove, I love you."
"It doesn't matter," she admits brokenly. "I don't love you. Stay away, or else."
She backs away. There's so much fucking fire in those beautiful eyes. Dark, resilient, angry fire. She's going to be okay. She's going to get through this. But she'll do it without me.
As for me, I'm not sure how I'll survive the hurricane that just came in and ruined my goddamn life.
The last memory I have of Dove Canterbury is her slamming the motel room door closed on me and leaving me the shell of a man I used to be. She even takes the hoodie. She has evidence against me now. She really could turn me in.
And yet my first thought isn't how to get over the woman whose life I've ruined. No, it isn't – because I'm sick, and I can't help myself, and I'm already fucking plotting how to stalk her until she gets over this. Until she changes her mind.
She has to.
Chapter 32
Dove
I don't know how I find my way home after everything at the motel. I'm in a delirious trance, bumping into people as tears stream down my face. My heart is pounding, my head heavy with disbelief and the shocking discovery I made today. Nox is a monster. A cruel, vicious monster.
I know he thinks he did this to help me. But he's destroyed my very soul. I already know I can never forgive him for what happened. I'll never forget what he took away from me.
Getting home, I slam the front door closed and fall to my knees. Now that I'm finally separated from him, I can see things clearly. I can see Nox for the monster he truly is. The deviant who's killed and hurt people to get to me. The stalker who kidnapped me and held me captive to fulfill his sick, twisted fantasy. And I almost fell for it.
Almost.
In a trance, I walk over to where my handbag lies discarded on the coffee table. I dig out my phone and plug it in to recharge the battery. Once the screen lights up, the pings never stop.
