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As a man with a complicated relationship with his own father, I understood Titus’ conflict. “Let me let you in on a little secret, Titus, one that grownups don’t want you to know.”
He looked up, all too familiar violet eyes eager to hear the secret. “What is it?”
“You don’t have to like everybody, even people who are related to you. You should try your best to be kind or civil, but you don’t have to like everyone.”
His shoulders relaxed, but only a little.
“Now, were you rude to him?”
His shoulders slumped a little further and Titus nodded. “A little.”
“That’s not right, but I’ll give you a pass because we’re buds and because the guy hasn’t been around for you. What’s in the bag?”
Titus perked up at that question. “Are we still friends, Ryan? Even though I went to dinner with Ferguson?”
Ah, those big sad eyes were a direct hit, straight to the heart. “Of course. Always. We’re buddies now and even when you’re old and grey, we’ll still be buddies.”
“You mean it?”
“Hell yeah, I do. I mean heck yeah.”
That seemed to lift his shoulders a little and he laughed. “I won’t tell Mom.”
“See? That’s what a buddy would do.”
He nodded, looking more mature than a kid his age should. “I brought you something from Cowboy Café. It’s your favorite.”
“Bacon mac and cheese? You’re the best buddy a guy could have.” I took the bag he held out to me and nodded for Titus to follow me to the kitchen. “Cookie?”
“Yes, please.”
I puttered around the kitchen, heating up the food and reaching into the cookie jar I had to keep beyond Titus’ reach because the kid could be a ninja when it came to sugary treats.
“Am I a bad person for not being nice to Ferguson, Ryan?”
I grabbed an oversized chocolate chunk cookie and stuck a fork in the takeout container before I took the seat across from Titus. I studied him for a long moment to see what was really eating at him.
“You’re not a bad person Titus.”
“I don’t think I wanna know him. Is that okay?”
Damn, this kid didn’t ask easy questions, did he? “What did your mom say?”
He shrugged. “I didn’t ask her.”
“It’s okay that you don’t want to know him now. It’s okay to feel hurt that he wasn’t in your life, but one day you might change your mind, and that’s okay too.” I shoved a big forkful of food in my mouth to give myself time to think. “You don’t have to dislike Ferguson because of me. It’s all right to be curious about him. You won’t hurt my feelings, I promise.”
A small smile kicked up one side of the kid’s mouth and he shrugged. “I like you better.”
“Thanks, I like you better too. But you’re not getting any of my bacon mac.”
Titus laughed. “I ate mine already. It was so good.” Then he took a big manly bite of his cookie. “This is better though.”
“Can’t argue with that. Does your mom know you’re here?”
“Yeah.”
And she’d chosen to stay behind. I wanted to think it was to give me and Titus some time for guy talk, but I had a feeling she was upset with me. “You up for some World Building?”
Titus perked right up, all thoughts of being a bad person gone at the mention of his second favorite video game. “Yeah!”
It was the perfect way to unwind and it only took about thirty minutes of game play before Titus was dozing off with the controller in his hand. I scooped him in my arms, took a deep breath and carried him home.
Persy
Titus had chosen to talk to Ryan over me and I was okay with it. Totally freakin’ okay. I swear. Instead of pouting about it, which I was tempted to do, I took a long hot bath to soak my tired bones and let the stress of the past few weeks melt away.
Between a burgeoning relationship with Ryan and the sudden reappearance of Ferguson, my shoulders were so stiff and my jaw so tense they could crack at any moment, if such things were possible. A hot lavender scented bath was exactly what I needed, if only I could soak my brain in the bubbles.
Then maybe I could stop thinking about Ryan and his cold shoulder over the past few days. I earned some of it, I knew that. He was right, I shouldn’t have kept Ferguson a secret from him, but he was crazy as hell if he thought I would let him off so easily.
Ferguson was a non-issue in my life and my heart, but he had done one thing for me, helped me solidify my feelings for my best friend. Spending a day or two without Ryan wasn’t what I wanted for my life. A day without tasting his lush lips, feeling the hard ridges of his muscles, was a day I wanted no part of.
