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I wanted him to say “holding you,” but instead he said, “The stunts some of them did.”
I nodded, chewing on my lip. My mind whirred like a broken gear spinning without anything to moor it down.
The car pulled up then with a loud roar coming from its exhaust, the valet parking Rocky’s shiny Corvette directly in front of us. I noticed Rocky slip out a twenty-dollar bill as a tip, handing it to the grateful valet. My door was already open. I slipped in and Rocky closed it behind me.
In the car, silence reigned. What was going on? Did I smell bad? Was it my breath? I subtly covered my mouth and pretended to yawn.
Nope. I smelled like goddamn daisies and dreams. It couldn’t have been that… but then what had twisted Rocky’s panties into a tangled bunch?
“You can drop me off at home,” I said to him as he pulled onto the highway. “Just get off on Kendall Drive.”
“Are you ready to call it a night?”
“I thought…”
He glanced my way, the orange glow of the passing lights playing off his eyes. “You tired?”
I shook my head. “No, not at all. But, well, are you upset at something?”
There it was. Might as well rip it off like a Band-Aid. Clearly something was going on, so maybe he could just be up-front with me and fill me in. If this wasn’t going to work, I’d rather he told me now before I caught any feelings.
His eyes turned back to the road, both his hands on the black leather steering wheel. The air freshener filled the space with vanilla. I took in a deep breath, expecting the axe to drop down on my head.
“I’ve got some shit I have to deal with, Sam.”
Oh. Well, I wasn’t really expecting that.
“Nothing to do with you,” he continued. “I’ve just been through shit that fucked me up. I’m still healing. And tonight unexpectedly opened up some of those old wounds.”
My eyebrows rose in surprise. “Is it okay if I ask what happened?”
“It’s okay.” Rocky’s grip tightened around the wheel. “But I’m not ready to talk about it. I’m sorry.”
“That’s totally fine. I get it.”
“You do?”
I nodded, looked out the window. We were driving onto an overpass. Underneath us were quiet homes with their residents tucked into bed, completely unaware of the kind of conversation happening right above their heads.
“We’ve all got some shit, don’t we? Everyone we walk past, everyone we say hi to, every telemarketer who calls me at four in the morning because that’s apparently their witching hour.”
Rocky chuckled at that. “You’ve got some shit, too, huh?”
“Like you wouldn’t believe,” I said on an exhale.
“Try me.”
I considered it for a moment. Did I open up to Rocky in a way he clearly wasn’t ready to do for me? Something about this scared me. Was I just opening myself up for more hurt, or was this a necessary step? Not just for Rocky and me, but for myself. I had to be able to talk about what happened to me, because it still affected me.
“I was at a party,” I started. The floodgates opened with that simple sentence. No turning back now. “A frat party. It was my first year of college. I went away for school, up to Boston. I’d never been away from my parents for more than a day, and now I was without them for an entire semester. I went balls to the grimy walls. I drank and I danced and I drank some more. It was one of the best nights of my life. So, the next day, I wanted to do it all over again. We got invited to the same frat house, and I was ready for round two. I wasn’t out at the time, but I thought maybe I could sneak a kiss with a closeted frat guy. So, I went to the bar one of them had set up in his room. It was dark, neon lights everywhere. I grabbed a drink he poured and started talking to someone I thought was a good prospect. He seemed so kind, so genuine. I had no idea.”
Rocky turned off on an exit, but it wasn’t toward my house. I focused on spilling out my guts, not really caring which direction Rocky was driving in.
“Little did I know, this prospect had a roofie in his pocket.”
Rocky took in a sharp breath. “Fuck.”
“I turn away for a second. I thought I had heard my name. That was all it took. He must have slipped it in. I drank about half the cup before it hit me. I couldn’t see, I couldn’t walk, I couldn’t even talk. Thank God Hazel was there, and she knew something was wrong from the second she saw me. She grabbed me, and with the help of someone else, they carried me into the car and took me straight to the hospital.”
