AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I don’t need your kind of support,” I shot the last word out like a bullet. One that clearly got a reaction, because anger laced Cal’s face. That rarely happened unless he was feeling out of control.
“A summer-fuckin-breeze could open your motel room door, Lana. What makes you think the person who burned your house down, or Brock, who has shown he has a taste for breaking in to your place, won’t find you here?”
I swallowed hard. I had no answer for that. And Cal’s need to keep me safe, physically at least, was driving his prime instinct. He let me have control in any other way I needed, but this was one area he’d fight me on until I caved.
“It doesn’t matter. You don’t have to worry about me anymore. I’m not your problem or yours to save. I can deal with the door, and my life, myself.”
“I’m trying,” Cal said. “Trying to give you what you need. Trying to give you space. But asking me to sit back while you’re in clear danger is not going to happen. I’m not going away. You’re more important than anything, and I’m tired of this.”
My brows shot up and I wanted to yell at him. To cry. To throw my hands up and scream a little too. “You are tired of this? Guess what, so am I. Only you and Jack are the ones who started this and I’m not playing anymore!” With a deep breath, I cursed my eyes to stop watering immediately. No way was I showing weakness now. I couldn’t let a single ounce of sadness or despair creep out, because once it did, I wouldn’t be able to call it back. Facts. I needed to cling to the facts.
“You set me up from the beginning,” I whispered. Fact. “You lied to me.” Fact. “You used me and passed me between the two of you like some—”
“I’m not going to let you finish that statement,” he said with fire. The edge of his voice was something not only my mind, but my body registered. And I hated it. Hated that my own self betrayed me. “I never used you.”
He went to reach for me, but I backed away. The look that flashed over his face was so pained it almost brought the threatening tears back up. Anger quickly surged and drowned out the need to cry. How dare he look like I was hurting him!
“Did you expect me to feel differently?” I asked.
Earlier, Jack had been demanding. Pushing me to believe him. While Cal was silently pleading. They pulled at every emotion I had. Memories flooded each time I caught the faint smell of Jack’s cologne or the flash of Cal’s dimples. They were imprinted in my mind and I couldn’t escape them. In any sense. And I’d tried for the past week.
Cal took a step closer, his big build closing in on me.
“I never want you to feel anything but loved. Come home
with me,” he whispered. “I don’t want you staying here any more than you want to be here.”
The last bit of tenacity I had left was dwindling rapidly. Because, honestly, I was ready to give in. Cal was right, I didn’t want to be in a shitty hotel. I didn’t want to sleep on stiff linen and take cold showers. I wanted to be wrapped up in the man I loved. I wanted my home to still exist. I wanted my life back.
My whole body and mind were at odds with…everything.
Cal looked at me, long and deep, and just the sight of him stung my ribs. The wounds of his betrayal were so fresh that every single second I was in his presence was like salt sprinkling over the gaping hole he’d left behind in my chest. And Jack only made it worse. Because while I made amends with the fact I’d never get over him, being in his proximity, feeling his heat, yet being too far away to harness the warmth, was torture. He’d left me. I’d rebuilt with Cal. And now I stood in the same town with two men who possessed equal and different parts of my entire being.
“I’m on shift for the next forty-eight hours,” Cal said, as if sensing he was losing me. “You can have the place to yourself. Avoid me all you want, just do it from my house.”
I glanced around the tiny room, then at the lock. Could someone have broken it? It was hard to admit that part of me was scared. Had been for a while now. I wanted to be able to sleep through the night just once.
If Cal was going to be on shift, maybe I could compose myself, rest, and be gone before he got home from the station.
It was still a step to take down a path that led me to Cal. And I couldn’t help wanting to run straight down that path and jump in his arms, no matter how unwise that was.
“I’ll let you flash the lights,” he said.
My gaze snapped to his and my brows shot up. He couldn’t mean…
“The truck is here?”
Cal let those incredible dimples free once more and nodded. He pointed just outside and I walked out the door, around the corner and—
“Whoop-whoop!”
The large red fire truck was parked in the back lot and sounded just a flick of the siren. The lights started flashing, and three guys waved from behind the windshield.
“You drove the fire truck here?” I turned to ask Cal.
Sticking his hands in his pockets, he shrugged. “Figured it was the only way to get you to agree to a ride. And if you barricaded yourself in the room, I was prepared to take out the ladder and carry you out.”
A small laugh escaped my lips.
