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Jenna glanced at her feet. “And there’s this guy.”
Miranda grinned but there was nothing amused in her expression. “There always is.”
“I…I don’t know what to do.”
Miranda cocked her head to the side and Jenna may have imagined it, but she could have sworn she looked concerned. For her.
“That’s impossible, Jen. You always know what to do.” The softness in her mother’s voice made that sting behind her eyes she’d been fighting prick harder.
“Not this time. Being with him isn’t simple. There’s a lot at stake, a lot I’ve worked really hard for and—”
“Do you love him?”
Jenna’s head snapped up. The question was so simple and not at all what she expected to hear from her mother. But Jenna nodded. “Yes, I do.”
Miranda tsked. “That’s a tough one then. No matter what, you will always give up something for the love of a man.” Her mother’s eyes bore down on her. “Always.”
Seeing the last several years flash across her face, Jenna knew that her mother spoke the truth. Had lived it.
“You just have to figure out what you want more, and if it’s him, hope to God that he’s worth what you’d lose by choosing him.”
“What if I could find a way to not lose something?” Maybe if Colt could just hang in there with her for a few more days until after the vote, then maybe they could give their relationship a real, public, try.
Miranda shook her head. “What’d I just say? You always lose something.”
“What did you lose?”
Miranda ran a hand through her ratty hair and glanced at the sky. It was then that Jenna saw tears in her eyes.
“I lost myself,” she whispered. And thus, confirmed Jenna’s fear.
Jenna pinched the bridge of her nose. Her stomach hurt and her mother’s sadness was something she didn’t know how to fix, but she wished so much she could.
“Well, I just came by to drop those off. I have to get home. I’ll see you later, Mama.” Jenna walked to her car and before she got in, her mother yelled at her, but not in the way she was used to.
“Make sure that guy is good enough for you, little girl.”
Jenna’s eyes snapped to her mother, who nodded once quickly and shut the trailer door. All her life, she had never known how badly she sought her mother’s approval until that moment.
…
When Jenna pulled up to her house, she didn’t expect to see Abigail sitting on her front steps.
“Hey, you okay?” she asked, getting out of the car and hustling to the waiting seven-year-old. Abigail instantly stood up and hugged Jenna. “Oh, honey, what’s wrong?” Jenna hugged her back.
“I get to go to play at Cindy’s in the mornings since it’s summertime, but then go home for lunch. I…I didn’t want to be there so I came here.”
Jenna sat Abigail down on the stoop and took the spot next to her. “Why don’t you want to be there?”
Abigail shrugged.
“Are you hurt?” Jenna asked. She’d asked this same question several times over the years. While Jenna knew Abigail’s mother wasn’t great and didn’t treat her daughter well, she’d never seen bruises on the girl, nor had Abigail ever admitted her mother hurt her. There was little Jenna could do, other than provide a safe place to go. Because Jenna knew firsthand that verbal abuse could be more destructive than physical.
“No, not hurt.” Abigail hugged her knees. “Mama is just being mean today.” Jenna patted Abigail’s shoulder. “I came here yesterday and before that, but you weren’t home so I just sat here. Is that okay?”
Jenna’s eyes went wide. She had been off with Colt when Abigail needed someone. Needed her.
“You can come here anytime. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here, honey.”
